    Summary: Boy gets caught trying to b a baby again by his mother. His
    mother starts treating him unwilling like the baby he wanted to play
    like. He tries to tell her he wants to be a big boy but she doesn't
    listen.

                                  WHEN IT ALL STARTED

    	When I was nine years old we lived way out in the country. My
    brother Jimmy was just a baby at twenty-eight months old, still doing
    baby things. I envied him so much I would sneak his bedtime bottle
    after mom diapered me and tucked me in for the night. I was still
    wetting the bed at night, so to keep the bed and sheets dry mom
    diapered me just like Jimmy. Jimmy and I slept in the same double bed.
    He slept against the wall so he would not fall out and get hurt. His
    bedtime was at 8:00; my bedtime was 9:00. He was asleep when I came to
    bed so he never saw mom diaper me. After mom left the room I would take
    Jimmy’s bottle so I could start to suck an almost full bottle. He never
    drank that much, just about an ounce, and he was asleep.
    	I would finish the bottle before falling asleep. Once an awhile
    it would still be in my mouth when I woke up. No one ever caught me
    sucking his bottle at night or with it still in my mouth in the
    morning. Jimmy likes his pacifier, too. He always had a binkie in his
    mouth if he was not eating. One night after I finished the bottle I put
    his binki against his mouth and he began it suck it even though he was
    still asleep. I thought it must be good if he does it in his sleep. So
    I looked on the nightstand for one of his extra binkies. I knew Jimmy
    had a lot of them so it would be easy to find one. I found one in a
    tray with a string and clip so I clipped it on my pajamas and started
    to suck on it.
    	After sucking on the pacifier for just minutes I found out why
    Jimmy likes his binkie so much, it relaxed me so much. I quickly fell
    asleep. The next morning mom caught me sucking the pacifier clipped to
    my pajamas with the bottle on my side of the bed. Jimmy woke up and saw
    that I was sucking his binkie he grinned and giggled. I spit it out and
    tried to explain but mom just ignored it like it was normal for a nine-
    year-old to be sucking a pacifier. Mom checked Jimmy’s diaper and said,
    “You’re dry again; you are getting to be a big boy.”
    	Without checking, mom said, “Let’s get Donny out of his wet
    diaper so we can eat breakfast.” Jimmy just watched as mom removed a
    soaked diaper and put a pair of Pull-ups on me for the day as normal.
    Mom said, “Only if you wake up dry can you wear regular underpants. If
    you’re wet mom makes you wear Pull-ups.” On the way to eat breakfast
    Jimmy wet his diaper I could see the yellow spreading on the front of
    it as mom put him in his booster seat and fastened his seat belt but
    mom did not say a word.
    	I sat in my booster seat without fastening my belt. I would not
    fall out. I was a big boy, not a baby like Jimmy. Mom put a bib around
    Jimmy’s neck and sat his cereal in front of him. He started to feed
    himself, making a mess of the table and his bib. I ate my cereal neatly
    without the mess. Soon after we started to eat I smelled poop. Jimmy
    made a mess in his diaper while we sat at the table. Now mom has two
    messes caused by Jimmy-- one on the table and bib; one in his diaper.
    	“Jimmy is just a baby,” mommy says. “He will learn fast and will
    be just like me, neat and clean at the table.”
    	I wish I could do the things Jimmy does and not get into trouble.
    If I made a mess like Jimmy I would get spanked and made to stay in my
    room for an hour. Even it I spilled a crumb of food on the table I
    would be punished. Jimmy has a lot more fun than me. He doesn’t have to
    pick up his toys or try to stay clean when he plays. He doesn’t have to
    go to the potty to pee or poop; he just does it when he wants to.
    	Mom took Jimmy for his morning bath. She told me to clean up the
    mess on the table and get dressed so I can go out side and play. I
    finished the cleanup, got dressed for play, walked into the bathroom to
    see a very messy wet diaper on the floor with a lot of used wipes. I
    told mom I was going out to the barn to play.
    	I wish I could be like Jimmy. He has it so good. Mommy takes care
    of him all the time, making sure he is happy. Jimmy doesn’t have to use
    the potty or stay clean all the time. He can be messy and not get into
    trouble. I climbed up into the hayloft where all the baby nursery
    furniture was stored. Since Jimmy is sleeping in a bed with me he
    doesn’t need a crib, and he is eating in a booster seat, so he doesn’t
    need a highchair. All the other toddler things are stored up in the old
    hayloft. I had been setting it all up so I could play baby my nursery
    that I made myself. I finished it yesterday. Now I can start playing
    baby. I had so much fun for the next few hours in the crib, then in the
    highchair, then the playpen, being careful not to latch the highchair
    tray or the crib rail. They are to hard to work for me. I was having so
    much fun. Then mom called me in to eat lunch. I had used the training
    potty I used when I was a toddler so I would not have to go into the
    house and stop my baby playtime.
    	I played in the hayloft every morning for about three weeks with
    no one finding out my secret. I played with baby toys in the playpen,
    sucked my binkie all the time just like Jimmy played in the crib. It
    was almost as good as being a real baby but I did not have diapers. I
    wish I could have diapers just like a real baby.
    	Then I explored the loft more. I went deeper to where I have
    never been. I found a box with white cloth things that had Curity
    printed in blue on them. At the bottom of the box I found another box
    that had ‘Curity diapers 47” X 27”’ printed on it. There were big
    safety pins and big plastic pants in the bottom of the box, too. It was
    a gold mine to me. The box had instructions on the back on how to
    diaper a baby with cloth diapers.
    	Just as I found my prize mom called me in for lunch. I would have
    to wait until later to wear them. After lunch mom told me to take a
    bath and stay with Jimmy when he finishes his nap so we can go
    shopping. I took my bath and put the clothes mom had laid out for me to
    wear shopping, including my Pull-ups with no pants to cover my training
    pants. I played with a few of Jimmy’s trucks and cars quietly in the
    family room.
    	Mom checked Jimmy’s diaper, finding it clean and dry. She removed
    it and sat him on his new training potty where he promptly peed and a
    few minutes later I heard him fart. Mom said, “What a big boy we have
    here!” She told me to look at what Jimmy did; he pooped and peed in the
    potty like a big boy. Mom was so happy she put a pair of my Pull-ups on
    him, making him so happy, too.
    	She told Jimmy to tell her when he needs to pee and Donny (that’s
    me) will take him to pee in the potty and be a big boy like Donny.
    Jimmy was so happy to be like me. We were both dressed in tee shirts
    and Pull-ups. Jimmy pointed at my Pull-up then pointed at his Pull-up
    and grinned and giggled. Mom handed me my summer shorts to hide my
    Pull-up. She watched Jimmy and I pull up our shorts we were now dressed
    the same we look like twins but I was a few inches taller. I was quite
    upset I did not want to be dressed like a toddler out in public. I
    forgot to use the potty before leaving the house to go shopping.
    Halfway to the store I told mommy I have to pee. Mom said, “big boys
    know to use the potty before they leave the house,” she told me. She
    thought that I was a big boy and should have used the potty before we
    left the house without being reminded. She told me to hold it until we
    get there. Ten minutes later we were pulling into the parking lot with
    me wetting my Pull-up. I wet just a little, thinking mom would not find
    out.
    	Mom checked Jimmy’s Pull-up, saying, “Still dry? What a big boy
    he is!” Jimmy said, “Yes, mommy, me big boy.” Mom put Jimmy in the cart
    seat then picked me up to put me in the cart basket. Mom checked my
    Pull-up out of habit as she released my seat belt on my booster seat.
    She felt my Pull-up squish, then did a quick check to see if her
    suspicion was right. Sure enough, I had wet my Pull-up.
    	Mom said, “Shame on you, Donny. You peed your pants. We are going
    to have to get you changed now.” I thought she would just give me
    another pair of Pull-ups. Mom laid me in the back of our SUV on a
    changing mat where mom pulled down my pants to my knees and tore my
    Pull-up off like it was a diaper. I started crying hard so she put a
    pacifier in my mouth to keep me quiet. I started to suck it without
    thinking mom had a diaper under me powdering my bottom pulling it up
    between my legs taping it in place just like a baby. She stood me up,
    pulled my wet shorts in place and told Jimmy, “this is what happens to
    babies that wet their pants.”
    	I asked mom, “What about the big wet spots? Everyone will see
    me.” Mom said that I should have thought about that before I wet my
    pants like a baby. We went into the store to buy our food and things. I
    had to hold the side of the cart like a little boy. Mommy did not trust
    me yet. When we started to walk down the baby aisle mom looked at the
    diapers then at me. She asked me if I was going to be a big boy or a
    baby. Jimmy said he was a big boy not a baby, he don’t need diapers.
    Mom looked at me I said that I was not a baby. I did not need the
    diapers. So mom picked up a Jumbo package of Pull-ups and handed them
    to me to put in the cart. She told me I was wearing the last diaper at
    our house so I would be wearing these Pull-ups to bed from now on.
    	I quickly put the package in the cart and we headed to the
    checkout. Jimmy said he needed to pee so mom stopped at the restrooms
    lifted him out of the cart and told me to take him to the potty. I lead
    him to a stall he pulled down his pants sat on the potty where he peed
    and pooped like a big boy should. When we returned to mom she asked me
    if Jimmy was a big boy. Jimmy said. Me pee pee and poo-pooed in the
    potty. Mom smiled and said, “Looks like we have a real big boy here
    now!”
    	My pants still had visible wet spots showing that mom ignoredm
    saying now I have two big boys. Then why do I fell like a baby wearing
    a diaper bulging out under my wet pants. We walked to the car mom put
    me in Jimmy’s car seat saying she did not want me getting the cloth in
    my booster wet with my wet pants they were not done drying out for some
    reason I must have really soaked them. We went to McDonald’s for lunch
    Jimmy sat next to me in a booster seat we ate our Happy Meal.
    	A friend of mom’s came to our table to talk she looked at me
    sitting at the table and asked when did Donny go back it diapers. I did
    not know you could tell I was wearing diapers until then. Mom told her
    that I had an accident this morning and did not have anything else for
    me to wear. She said that Jimmy looks like the big boy not wearing
    diapers. Mom said he has not had and accident in three days. Jimmy is
    going to be wearing regular underpants tomorrow.
    	We finished our lunch and were on our way home I sat in the baby
    seat thinking what has happened to me today being put back in diapers
    again. When we got home mom unpacked the groceries while Jimmy and I
    played.
    	Just before lunch I told mom I need to go potty she told me to go
    ahead a go I am a big boy and don’t have to tell her every time I need
    to go. I told her what about my diaper she told me to take it off and
    throw it away. I had an idea why just throw away a clean dry diaper so
    I went to play more with Jimmy and while playing I soaked the diaper.
    Wetting my diaper while playing was so much fun and no one knew I was
    doing it.
    	Mom called us to eat dinner an hour later after I forgot about my
    wet diaper. Mom sniffed the air and checked Jimmy. Finding him dry, she
    just let it go. I knew she was looking for something so when we
    finished dinner I ran to the bathroom to remove my wet diaper. I put a
    Pull-up on because that is the only underwear I could find I threw the
    wet diaper in the full trash can in the bathroom. Now I could take the
    full can to our burning barrel when I take the one from the kitchen so
    no one would find out what I did.
    	That night mom told me that my bedtime is the same time as
    Jimmy’s until I stopped wetting my bed like a baby. I watched mom dress
    Jimmy in cloth underwear and pajamas then he watched me pull on my
    Pull-up and pajamas. Jimmy giggled saying, “me a big boy” as mom handed
    him his bedtime bottle. He laid down sucking his bottle as I got in
    bed, too. Mom tucked us in for the night. Jimmy fell asleep quickly so
    I was able to take his bottle and satisfy my need for a bottle, too. I
    fell asleep just as the bottle emptied leaving it still in my mouth
    when mom came in the room in the morning. She quietly woke Jimmy so he
    could see me too. I woke to Jimmy’s giggles.
    	I watched as mom told Jimmy to remove his pajamas and underwear
    and handed him new underwear and clothes he dressed himself with very
    little help from mom. Then mom removed my pajamas and wet Pull-up then
    started to wipe my bottom with a baby wipe put baby powder on my
    bottom. She handed me a fresh Pull-up and told me top get dressed and
    come to eat breakfast. I felt so ashamed that my baby brother is out of
    Pull-ups and I have to still wear them. After I ate breakfast I decided
    to go to my nursery in the loft where I was not ashamed to be a baby.
    	When I climbed the ladder I remembered the cloth diapers I found.
    I need to see if they fit me if I could figure out how to put them on.
    I climbed onto the changing table and started to try to put one of the
    diapers on and just about fell off so I fastened the strap across my
    chest securing me from falling off. It took me about a half hour
    pinning and re-pinning my diaper until I got it right. I unfastened the
    strap and climbed off the changing table grabbed a pair of plastic
    pants.
    	I climbed into the playpen and started to play with the baby toys
    forgetting about being ashamed of mom showing Jimmy what a big baby I
    was. I felt the need to pee so I let it out the cloth quickly soaked up
    the small amount of pee I needed to let out. I continued to play then
    mom called me to eat lunch. I jumped out of the playpen removed my wet
    plastic pants and diaper put it into the diaper pail I found and ran to
    eat lunch.
    	I started doing this every morning because after noon I had to
    play with Jimmy for the rest of the day. I found that Jimmy only need
    to pee two or three times a day while I need to pee four or five maybe
    six times a day and once before bedtime. That must be why he stopped
    wetting the bed. He can hold more pee longer than me maybe if I could
    hold more I would be dry at night, too.
    	I tried to hold more but ended up wetting my Pull-ups and mom was
    getting mad telling me I was going to be put back into diapers if it
    happens once more. So I limited my wetting to the times I was in my
    nursery. Two weeks of wet diapers in the diaper pail and one that I
    messed in by accident was filling it up. I started to put them on the
    floor of the loft I was so use to the smell I did not smell them. Mom
    came to the barn to get something I don’t know what and started looking
    for where the smell was coming from. She climbed the ladder and found
    my nursery all set up.
    	Jimmy was napping I was playing in the play yard mom decided she
    would show me how to be a baby if that is what I wanted. She called
    grandma to see if she would watch us for the rest of the day. So Jimmy
    and I went to grandma’s for the afternoon we left our house at 2:00
    that left mom four hours to do what she had planned.
    	Mom spent all afternoon bringing my nursery all down from the
    loft where she set the crib and changing table in our bedroom replaced
    the double bed with a racecar bed for Jimmy. The playpen she set in the
    family room the highchair in the kitchen. While she was sitting up the
    nursery she washed all the diapers and plastic pants I had wet in for
    the last two weeks. She folded my clean fresh smelling cloth diapers
    stacking them under the changing table next to my fresh smelling
    plastic pants. She put all my new toddler style clothes in a nursery
    painted dresser she was now ready for her new baby boy.
    	When Jimmy and I got home I asked if I could play outside for a
    while I did not want to go in the house now. Mom told me okay but to
    stay in the play yard and not to leave it. I was a good boy and never
    disobeyed my mom I played with the toys just like I was a four-year-old
    not a nine-year-old I was having so much fun sliding, swinging and
    playing in the sand. It was summertime there was NO SCHOOL at 7:00PM it
    was still quite hot outside all the clothes I was wearing were my Pull-
    ups. Living way out in the country has its advantage no one would see
    me wearing baby clothes I did not care it was better than getting all
    hot and sweaty. Mom called me in to eat dinner so I got up from the
    sand and ran to eat dinner. I also need to poop and pee I have been
    holding it back while I played I was having so much fun playing to go
    use the potty. While I was playing mom had plenty of time to tell Jimmy
    what was going to happen to me so he would not be scared when it did.
    	I walked into the kitchen I saw the highchair from my nursery
    then my heart sank I knew mom must have found my nursery. Mom came to
    the kitchen told me to get in the highchair NOW since that is where I
    must want to be. She said she saw my nursery and how I have been using
    all the baby things. I started to cry and plead my case to mom. I said.
    Mommy I am sorry I would not do it any more I am sorry as I climbed in
    the seat I said I don’t want to be a baby I was just playing. Mom
    fastened the seat belt from behind out of my reach followed by the
    tray.
    	Mom and Jimmy left the room leaving me sitting in the chair after
    about fifteen minutes I tried to get out of the chair but the tray was
    somehow lock in place and the seat belt was out of my reach. I started
    to kicked and screamed like a two year old I thought I could kick the
    chair apart. I needed to pee real badly now so I started to yell and
    scream I need to go potty but no one came. I was mad so I decided to
    show her I was telling the truth about me needing the potty I want to
    mess just a little just enough that mom would know I meant what I said.
    But just a small amount of poop went into my Pull-up a small amount of
    pee started out the all the sudden I lost all control of myself big
    time. All the poop and pee I was holding came out losing control
    wetting and messing at the same time.
    	I quieted down after my deed was done sitting in my highchair in
    my wet and messy Pull-up. It did feel sort of good every time I moved
    the poop squished around. Fifteen minutes after I messed myself Jimmy
    came in the room and yelled to mommy baby has poopy he stinks, too. I
    lost it my baby brother just called me the baby and started to cry real
    hard as mom came in running to the room. Mom said. Mommy will make it
    all better. Mom said. But first we need to eat our dinner. Mom put a
    bib around my neck and started to feed me baby food after three jars of
    food and one jar of baby food peaches. I looked like a baby as I had a
    messy face and bib because all the squirming I was doing to get away.
    	When mom finished my dinner I was a real mess all over food on my
    face and poop on my bottom mom carried me to a warm bath to get me all
    cleaned up. Before getting in the tub mom cleaned most of the food from
    my face with a washcloth before she cleaned the poop off my butt. I was
    given a warm bath by mom with Jimmy helping until she thought I was
    nice and clean. I was left to play in the tub while mom with Jimmy
    helping got my night diaper ready for me. I played trying to forget
    that I had messed my pants like a toddler in front of my little
    brother.
    	Mom dried me off and carried to the changing table where she put
    a very thick cloth diaper on me much thicker than I ever thought it
    could be. I told mom I did not want to wear diapers any more as she
    pulled my plastic pants over my thick diaper. After being diapered she
    dressed me in a thin-footed sleeper that zipped up the back it was my
    old dinosaur sleepers that were to big for me two years ago. After I
    was dress for bed she put me in the crib and put a bottle to my lips. I
    realized she brought everything down from my nursery I started to suck
    as she held not letting me hold it just before it was empty I fell
    asleep. Mom replaced the bottle with a pacifier relaxing me even more.
    She told Jimmy his bedtime is now 8:30 he is a big boy and can sleep in
    the soft big boy bed with out a baby plastic sheet that we use for baby
    bedwetters. His new bed was a racecar with a twin size mattress in it
    and Scooby Doo sheet set. It was soft and warm so comfy.
    	The next morning Jimmy climbed out of his racecar bed went to the
    potty after he woke up getting more praise from mommy. Mom started to
    change my soaked diaper through my sleeper snap crotch. She dressed me
    in a slightly thinner daytime diaper it was still much thicker than the
    one I had been using in my loft nursery. She left the room, leaving me
    in the crib so I started to get out like I did in the loft but the
    sleeper would not let me straighten my legs and stand up or climb so I
    had to wait on someone to get me out I was helpless. I started to cry
    let me out mom came in handed me a bottle and told me breakfast was not
    ready yet she would let me out when it is. I started to suck the bottle
    mom left me alone I tried to remove the nipple from the bottle but
    could no so because I was so hungry I started to drink my bottle like a
    toddler should. Ten minutes later mom came in the room put me on the
    floor she told me she was not going to carry me around all the time.
    She told me told me to crawl to the kitchen.
    	I had to crawl like a baby to the kitchen. I was now feeling the
    need to poop as mom put me in the highchair. I told mom I need to poop.
    She just ignored me, putting the tray in place getting me ready for
    breakfast. She put cut-up pancakes on the tray without a plate or
    anything to eat with. She told me to eat up baby Donny or I would not
    get out of the chair. I started to pick up the pancakes with my fingers
    getting my hands and face all messy. I was just about done when I could
    not hold my poop longer. I thought I could poop just a little and stop
    not making more of a mess. I started letting out a small amount of soft
    poop then I lost all control again just like last night I loaded my
    diaper with a full load of soft poop followed by pee it happened so
    fast I was shocked how fast it was over.
    	Jimmy said, “He smells poopy!” Mommy said, “Yes, babies poop when
    they eat. So when we finish breakfast we need to change the baby.”
    Jimmy asked if he could help. Mom said, “Okay, I can show you how cloth
    diapers are used.” She handed me a bottle and told me to finish it
    before I get my diaper changed. Jimmy watched me finish my bottle.
    	Mom carried me to the changing table and strapped me down as I
    started to kick and cry. “I don’t want to be a baby. I am a big boy.” I
    told mom she made me do it because she would not let me out of the
    highchair to go potty, so it was her fault, not mine.” I told mom I was
    a big boy and did not need diapers I told her I could prove it. too.
    After she cleaned me up I started to kick her every time she brought
    the diaper near me. She finally gave in saying she will test me but if
    I have just one daytime accident I will go back to full-time diapers
    and wear them every where we go, I agreed.
    	Mom handed me take another bottle while she got me dressed in big
    boy clothes. I sucked the bottle because it was so relaxing while she
    cleaned my mess up. Mom put baby powder and baby smelling cream all
    over me she dressed me in the same color and style of clothes as Jimmy
    we looked like twins but I was three inches taller. The Pull-up cause a
    slight bulge around my pants that Jimmy’s pants did not have. Mom told
    me we were going to go to the zoo today. I love to go to the zoo. It
    was so much fun to me all the things to see and food to eat. The zoo
    was an hour away about, the max for me to hold pee.
    	I was in so much pain when we got to the zoo. I was in need to
    pee so much but I made it just like a big boy should. The whole day was
    fun for both Jimmy and me. We had eaten and drank so much junk food we
    were tired when we got back to the car. Halfway home I told mom I need
    the potty we were on the freeway with no exit near. Mom told me I had
    to hold it to stay a big boy but the more I tried to hold it the wetter
    I became. I knew I was in trouble now as I was as soaked as any un-
    potty trained toddler could be. Jimmy said. Mommy Donny has wet his
    pants I can see him. Mom asked me, Donny did you just go in your pants
    you know if you did your back in diapers. I started to cry and scream
    so loudly mom handed Jimmy a pacifier that he put in my mouth. I refuse
    the binki at first then after a few more tries Jimmy had it in my mouth
    I started to suck it. The pacifier was so relaxing within ten minutes I
    was asleep.
    	I was always a very sound sleeper and so just carried me into the
    house where she removed my wet clothes changed my diaper then put me in
    my crib. It was only 3:30. After my nap I woke up at 5:00 in my crib
    with a wet diaper crying for mom to let me out. Jimmy and mom came in
    the bedroom to see what was the matter I told mom it was her fault she
    did not stop and let me pee in the potty. Mom said. Jimmy had no
    problem staying dry so why didn’t you stay dry like him. I just
    whimpered as she changed my soaked diaper mom told me she will potty
    train me when she thinks I am ready for the potty but right now you are
    just a diaper baby. I cried as mom changed my diaper for a triple thick
    night diaper making it very hard for me to walk without falling down.
    	Mom let me out of my crib and told me to go play with Jimmy. All
    I was wearing was a very thick cloth diaper and plastic pants. I had to
    crawl to the playroom where Jimmy was playing with his cars and trucks.
    Jimmy did not giggle when he saw me because I was just a real baby now
    not his big brother. I crawled over to where he was playing to help him
    build a Lego tower but he started to cry stop, stop. Mom picked me up
    and put ME in the playpen saying babies play here not with the big
    boys. I cried to mom but I am the big boy I am not a baby Jimmy should
    play in here. Mom told me to stand up and get out then if I was so big.
    I stood up and tried to climb out of the playpen as soon as I had my
    leg in the air to swing it over the rail I fell down on my diapered
    butt. My diapers were so thick I could not get over the rail I had to
    stay in the playpen now until mom lifted me out. Jimmy could play with
    all my toys without me stopping him. I could play with his old toys
    without Jimmy interfering. But all his toys were for toddlers like ABC
    blocks Play-School baby toys and toddler toys they were not fun at
    first but the more I played with them the more fun I had. Soon I forgot
    where I was and started giggle like a real toddler.
    	Mom picked me up to check my diaper at 7:00 I had wet a little
    but I was not that wet. I asked mom where she was taking me. Mom said.
    It was time for me to take a bath and wash my diapered butt. I said mom
    this is not fare Jimmy goes before me. Mom said diaper boys are first
    no how but they are and you are the only diaper boy. I said. Mommy you
    had me wet my diaper I could not get out of the playpen and go potty.
    Mom asked. Did Jimmy use the potty? Jimmy stays dry for more than two
    hours. Can you stay dry that long? I started to cry mom was ready with
    a pacifier in my mouth it went.
    	I knew I was in trouble I need to pee all the time what am I
    going to do now. Sucking on my pacifier mom removed my wet diaper and
    put me in the warm water. Mom started to bathe me just like she did
    Jimmy when we took our baths together. I asked mom. Why don’t Jimmy
    need a bath too? She told me little boys that don’t wet themselves only
    need a bath every two days not every day. The bath was nice and warm as
    mom washed me all over for the first time in years I tried to help but
    she was in control after mom washed my hair she told me to play in the
    tube until she gets me out.
    	I played with the bath toys that ringed the tub forgetting it was
    bedtime for me. Mom walked in the bathroom lifted me out of the tub
    drying me off in a big fluffy warm towel. Then mom carried me to my
    bedroom to put me on my changing table to pin a waiting bedtime diaper
    on me. She pulled my plastic pants in place followed by a new sleeper
    that zipped up the back but was bigger than my old one. It was nursery
    print baby boy looking like it belonged on a baby not a nine-year-old.
    	I found myself in the crib and again could not raise my legs over
    the rail of the crib side and the rail was now at my chin. I was
    standing holding the side looking out like I was two years old
    whimpering with a pacifier in my mouth. Mom left the room with me
    standing waiting on her to return. Ten minutes later mom came in
    holding my bedtime bottle for some reason I was suddenly overjoyed and
    started to bounce up and down. Mom told me lay down. I let my pacifier
    drop out of my mouth it fell to the end of its string. I laid down and
    mom put my bottle in my mouth I started to suck it and hold it in
    place. Just before I emptied it I was asleep so my removed my bottle
    and put my pacifier to my lips and I started to suck it just like I did
    to Jimmy last month.
    	Jimmy came to bed later while I was asleep not waking me sleeping
    in his nice soft comfy racecar no plastic crinkle just soft warm cloth.
    The next morning Jimmy woke went to the potty just like a big boy. He
    returned to our room removed his pajamas to dress himself in his play
    clothes that mom had set out for him. He was all dressed by the time
    mom came to wake us up. She was so proud of him she told him to let me
    sleep while they ate breakfast.
    	Twenty minutes I woke with a need to poop very badly I started to
    stand up but as I moved poop started its way into my diaper. I stated
    to cry very loudly mom came in to see what happened Jimmy was right
    behind her. Mom picked me up and hugged me as I quieted. Mom carried me
    to the kitchen put me in my highchair. Still whimpering I was placed in
    my highchair where mom let Jimmy feed me my oatmeal.
    	After my breakfast mom told Jimmy baby Donny needs another bath
    he pooped his diaper last night and look how messy his face is. I tried
    to tell mom it was her fault but she had my pacifier in my mouth too
    quickly. Mom carried me to the bathroom started to get the water ready
    for me. While the water was running mom removed my sleeper and plastic
    pants leaving me in just a stinky wet diaper. My diaper was unpinned
    and it fell to the floor. Jimmy said. Only real babies poop in their
    diaper right mommy. Mom said. Yes only real babies poop in their
    diapers.
    	Mom cleaned up my messy butt with a washcloth out of the sink
    then lifted me in the tub to she washed me off just like last night I
    was not allowed to help no matter how much I tried. I was told to play
    while she got my play clothes ready. I thought at first she was going
    to give me back my big boy status. Until she came in dried my off in a
    warm fluffy towel wrapping me in it when she finished. Mom walked me to
    my bedroom where she put me on my changing table and quickly diapered
    me. I tried to talk with my pacifier in my mouth but mom shushed me.
    Mom dressed me in some funny looking clothes until they were on I did
    not realize they were just like a baby romper with BIG BIRD on the
    front.
    	I look in the mirror when she finished I looked like one of the
    kids at daycare in the baby class. I knew that because I was one of the
    only older kids that was allowed to help the teachers out. I started to
    remove my clothes but mom had my hand leading me to the car. I realized
    I was going to daycare with Jimmy. Mom grabbed a large bag that had
    DIAPERS printed on it I knew what it was for. I whimpered just a little
    sucking my pacifier hard to keep from crying like a baby. I was on my
    way to daycare dressed like a baby hoping I would not have to go to my
    old class. I was so scared I wet my diaper without knowing.
    	At daycare mom led me to the baby class where I was so happy that
    the other kids would not see me in diapers. I started to play
    forgetting where I was until lunchtime. Before we eat lunch each kid’s
    diaper has to be checked to see if he is dry. If the kid is dry he sits
    on the potty for five minutes. If the kid is wet or messy they change
    his diaper. When everyone is done with diaper, potty time one by one
    each kid is sat in a highchair.
    	They let me feed myself MORE BABY FOOD I am so tired of baby food
    but I was hungry so I ate it dropping just a little on my bib and tray.
    They told me to do better next time and I get to sit at the little
    table that Billy was sitting at eating big boy food. They said after a
    week with no spots on my bib or tray I graduate to big boy eater. They
    handed me a bottle I was thirsty so I started to suck as I sucked the
    need to poop came hard and fast so I let it out with out thinking. My
    diaper was wet and messy just like most of the other kids sitting in
    their highchairs.
    	I was just like a toddler in less the two days I lost all my big
    boy status no big boy clothes no big boy toys no big boy freedom. I was
    just like the baby I was trying to become in the loft. What will happen
    when school starts in two months? How can I get potty trained? If I
    can’t hold pee for more than an hour. How can I get a big boy bed like
    Jimmy’s if I still wet the bed. How can I get out of my highchair if I
    keep spilling food on my bib. I want my big boy status back but it is
    so hard to remember to hold my pee and poop not spill food and not pee
    when I sleep.

    WHAT HAPPENED NEXT

    	It has been three months since mom found out I was playing baby
    in the old hayloft using the old cloth diapers I found. I had my own
    private real nursery with the crib, highchair, playpen, and many other
    baby things mom had stored up there since no one needed them, not even
    Jimmy, my three-year-old brother. Mom decided that if I want to play
    baby use diapers like a baby she would treat me like a baby. I was
    still wetting my bed like a little toddler every single night. I was
    quite small for my age it would be easy for her keep me dressed like a
    toddler. Jimmy was getting upset about my night diapers crinkling at
    every move waking him up. The crinkle of the plastic sheet that was on
    our bed was horrible for him, too. He wanted a bed like Timmy Watson,
    his friend in town. It was a racecar big boy bed with a twin size
    mattress.
    	Mom turned me into a toddler baby just like my like Jimmy before
    he stopped using diapers and baby things two months ago. Jimmy said he
    wanted to be a big boy NOT a baby like Donny. He had been sleeping with
    me in a double bed, not wetting the bed in over a year and a half. I
    was the only bed wetter. I wore big boy Goodnites size small or big boy
    Pull-ups, not baby diapers. That is until three months ago I wore big
    boy underwear. Now mom has me wearing the cloth diapers I found in the
    hayloft. Mom would not listen to me. I kept telling her I wanted to be
    a big boy, not a baby. Mom told me that I needed to learn to stay dry
    for two hours during the day before I would be ready to potty train
    like Jimmy. She said I needed to be dry that way for three days then I
    could start wearing Pull-ups. Then she would consider me a big boy
    toddler.
    	No matter how hard I tried my diaper is always getting wet
    sometimes I could make it one hour but most of the times I can’t hold
    it 30 minutes without wetting my diaper like a little toddler. Mom got
    tired of my cloth diapers all the time needing to be washed I use so
    many so she tried some Huggies finding the best fit for me was size 5
    because I was so skinny.
    	Mom took me to the doctor for tests I spent a day and night in
    the hospital. Since I was still using diapers like a toddler small for
    my age I had to stay in the toddler room with five other boys. Two of
    the boys were potty-trained they were three-year-olds like my brother.
    The other three boys were two and a half-year-old’s still in diapers.
    My bed was between the potty-trained boys I had to endure five diaper
    changes while the big boys where using the potty in room. The hospital
    had rules about diapers beds and potties. If you use diapers or you are
    less than 5’ tall your bed is a CRIB with very tall sides. If you are
    over three or use the potty you have a regular bed even if you are less
    than 4’ tall. I used more diapers than the others needing six daytime
    changes between my tests. One I messed and wet in after I ate lunch
    just before my naptime.
    	I did not know I was one of two that still took a nap bottle.
    Only Kevin that just turned two still used a pacifier and bottle like
    me. The other boys did not tease me or anything. I was just another
    baby like them; they accepted all the infantile things I did. During my
    tests the doctors found that I had a very small bladder due to the fact
    my bladder did not stretch like it should. They told mom maybe practice
    holding my pee more would make it stretchy but it may never stretch.
    That explained why I need the potty all the time in kindergarten and
    first grade and second grade. I was going to the potty three times as
    much as anyone else and the other kids called me, “potty boy.”
    	When I got home from the hospital mom took away my diapers and
    gave me my underwear back. I was so happy but mom still diapered me at
    night. Two days after my hospital stay mom took my brother and me to
    the park in town. I met some boys from school and started to play with
    them but after just fifteen minutes of play I need to pee but I did not
    know where the potty was. I ran to mom to tell her I need the potty she
    pointed to the white building across the field and told me that was the
    potty. It was 100 yards away. I started to run but pee started to come
    out wetting my pants by the time I was about 50 yards away I stopped I
    was finished flooding my pants.
    	When I walked back to mom the boys I was playing with saw I had
    wet my pants and started to call me names and say things like, “little
    baby needs his mommy to put him in diapers”, “tell the baby’s mommy he
    needs diapers”, and “he is just a pee baby not a big boy.” Mom consoled
    me saying to try harder next time. I was crying so hard and could not
    stop. Mom put my pacifier in my mouth then took me to the women’s
    restroom to change my wet underpants for thick cloth training pants, no
    plastic pants. Then she helped me put on dry summer shorts. I looked
    almost normal except a slight bulge where my training pants were. I
    tried to play with the seven- eight- and nine-year-old boys but they
    teased me about wetting my pants too much. I whimpered and cried,
    walking away to play with the little boys my brother’s age. The little
    boys did not tease me for wearing training pants, even when I wet them
    again an hour later. I could not hold my pee no matter what I did if I
    did not constantly think to hold my pee my pants got wet. When I played
    I would get so into playing I forgot to hold my pee and soak my pants.
    	I kept wetting my pants more than going to the potty. Mom was
    getting so tired of doing my laundry caused by my accidents. I was
    wetting four or five training pants a day and every night I wet my
    diaper. All the little boys that my brother and I played with were so
    used to me having wet pants they would pay no attention to me wearing
    wet pants. By the middle of summer mom told me I was going to go back
    to diapers if I don’t stop wetting my pants. I did not care now because
    potty training me to hold my pee was too hard. Diapers would be easier
    for me. I told mom I did not care as I wet my pants in front of her.
    Looking her in her eyes, I was daring her to follow through with her
    threat. Mom got really mad, lead me to my room, stripped me of my
    clothes and spanked me hard for five minutes. I thought I was going to
    die. It hurt so bad! Then mom put me on the changing table, smoothing
    baby powder on me. It felt so good. I just about fell asleep as she
    diapered me like a baby. She had bought me some new blue nursery print
    plastic pants that she pulled up over my thick diapers, making me look
    and feel just like a toddler. I did not care. Besides, these diapers
    felt so good but I had to waddle when I walked out to play.
    	Mom told me it was hot outside and toddlers don’t need any other
    clothes to mess up. Since I was just a toddler these diapers are all I
    needed. I asked mom, “What about my brother? He is a toddler, isn’t
    he?” Mom told me, “If you are out of diapers, you are a big boy, not a
    toddler.” Until I start using the potty like a big boy I will be
    treated like a toddler should be.
    	I waddled out of the house wearing my new blue nursery print
    plastic pants that was covering my thick cloth diapers. Mom had pinned
    three thick diapers on me, making it difficult for me to walk keeping
    me where she wanted. My brother and I were playing in our yard alone.
    He did not care I was diapered like a baby, he was not. He likes to
    show off that he was a big boy wearing big boy clothes and did not want
    baby diapers. He would always say “potty” time when he went to the
    potty. He only went to the potty two or three times a day. He only used
    the potty once after breakfast, once before lunch and once before
    bedtime, and maybe one other time during the day. He had his third
    birthday last month and mom gave him a bye-bye to his baby things party
    the day before his birthday, he was so happy. He gave me all of his
    pacifiers, bottles, bibs, tee shirts and his leftover Huggies. He did
    not need or want them; he was a BIG BOY. I WAS THE BABY NOW! That did
    not bother me, even though I was nine-years-old. All I wanted to do is
    have fun playing with toys; even baby toys would satisfy me.
    	I asked mom, “Just because I wear diapers don’t make me a baby,
    does it?”
    	Mom said, “No, but you still sleep in a crib because you keep
    falling out of your wet bed. You eat in a highchair because you keep
    spilling food all over the table. You wear a bib because of you’re a
    messy eater. You don’t share toys well so you play in a playpen alone
    at daycare, and you are all the time crying so you need to keep a
    pacifier in your mouth to keep you quiet.”
    	School was going to start in three weeks and my potty training
    has stopped. Mom got a doctor’s explanation of my problem and took it
    to school. That way I was allowed to wear diapers to school. I only
    pooped in my diaper after my breakfast or in my crib. I would poop in
    the potty if mom would get me to the potty in time after I ate
    breakfast. Sometimes I pooped after I woke up in my crib. I could not
    hold it until mom could get me out of my crib in time. Mom never
    changed my diaper until after I ate breakfast. I would have to sit in
    my highchair in my dirty diaper while I ate my breakfast. I ate in a
    messy diaper about 95% of the time. I just could not stop poop very
    well. I only pooped in the morning, sometimes at night before going to
    bed, so messy diapers at school never happened.
    	I was smart and small for a nine-year-old. I was about the size
    of a kindergarten kid but good at fighting and could back down most
    twelve-year-old kids. The first day back at school when an eleven-year-
    old started pushing me around I bloodied his nose and blacked his eye.
    Mom had to come to school and sign me back in to school the next day. I
    could have worn just diapers to school from then on with no problems
    but I kept my diapers covered up. The other kids respected me even
    though I need diapers. Sixth grade was easy for me since I learned to
    read when I was four years old. My brother is starting to learn to
    read, too; he is only three. Mommy was so good at teaching us school
    things.
    	I was content to play with baby and toddler things with my
    brother. He was as big as me and he liked older kid toys. I liked my
    rocking horse, building blocks, trucks and cars, and my tricycle. My
    brother was learning to ride a two-wheeler with training wheels,
    something I was afraid of. I fell off every time I tried to do it so
    the last time I fell and hurt my arm really bad I stopped trying to
    ride it. I was just like most two-year-olds, not like a nine-year-old.
    I guess that is why I liked to play baby in the loft. I did not have to
    try to be a big boy; it was too hard to do. I was not afraid to fight
    or climb like most strong-willed toddlers, but most every other thing
    big boys did was too hard for me so I did not even try to do them. My
    brother would try everything until he succeeded not me if it looked too
    hard I would not try.
    	When school was out for the summer I had my tenth birthday still
    wearing and using diapers like a toddler, not ready of the potty going
    to daycare with my brother. I was in the toddler baby class because you
    need to be potty trained before I could go play with the big boys. My
    brother was in the pre-Kindergarten - Kindergarten class. He had his
    big boy fun I had my toddler fun. My fun was better than his fun to me
    and his fun was better to him than my fun. My fun was toys and swings;
    his fun was competitive board games like Candy Land. We both love to
    swim in the pool. I was the best swimmer in daycare; even the eleven-
    and twelve-year-olds were not as good as me. I could dive from the high
    dive, swim under water the length of the pool; I was the best in the
    water.
    	One day a new daycare worker was taking my class to the swimming
    pool. As soon as we got there she had my toddler class get into the
    toddler pool. When she had her back turned I climbed up the high dive
    to do my dive when she screamed out to me as I walked to the end of the
    diving board. I dove off and she passed out cold. A few minutes later
    with the lifeguards help she came to. They explained that I was one of
    the best swimmers there. She never forgave me for my stunt. She would
    try to embarrass me at every diaper change, giving me a pacifier or
    bottle all the time, treating my like a one-year-old, not a toddler.
    Her treatment of me did not bother me- I LOVED IT.

    More maybe later if you want?

    Donny

`whitedog@columbus.rr.com`

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