Hi my name is Ken and this is my story.

My parents left on Friday for a business trip to New York City in September of 2001. I did not go with them because I was in school, so they left me at home. I am sixteen, so I can take care of myself, but I had to check in with our next door neighbor Mrs. Rice.

So Friday after school I checked in with Mrs. Rice. She has two sons; one is a two-year-old named Jack the other is a two-month-old named Mat. She said that I should come in so I did. She asked if I had any homework, and I did and I said that I would do it sometime this weekend. She said that now would be a good time to get it started.

“Yes, Mrs. Rice, I will see you tomorrow.” I said.

“Please stay Ken, you can do your homework here then have dinner with us.” Mrs. Rice stated.

I gave in and stayed, heck, a cooked meal that I did not have to cook from a selection that my mom had left me in the refrigerator.

I sat at the kitchen table and did my homework, it took longer than I had planed, but maybe that was because Mrs. Rice and I had talked. I found out that she was only ten years older than I was, her husband’s first name was Andy, and he was on the road three weeks out of four. She found out that I did not have a current girl friend and my best friend was on his way to see his grandparents. We also talked about, the car I wanted to get, and what I wanted to do to it. It was nice to have some one to talk with.

Jack had been watching his Barney videotape while we talked and I did my homework. Mat was asleep in his room. It was just before five o’clock when Mat started to cry. I followed Mrs. Rice into Mat’s room I do not why I did it I just did. She picked up Mat, and removed him from his crib and then handed him to me.

“Sit there and I will be right back with his bottle.” Mrs. Rice told me.

I sat in the chair holding a crying baby. Mrs. Rice came back with his bottle, and told me how to hold him and then handed me his warm bottle of milk. I had Mat’s little bottom in my lap and an arm under his head. Once the nipple touched his lips the crying stopped and he started drinking from his bottle. I got a very hard erection from this. When Mat was done with his bottle, Mrs. Rice then had me burp Mat. A small wet spot showed on my pants Mrs. Rice stated that it looked like Matt’s diaper had leaked. Matt’s diaper had not leaked, but I did not tell her that.

Mrs. Rice took Mat from me, and placed him on his changing table and changed his diaper. She commented that his diaper did not seem to be that wet that it would have leaked, but he did need to be changed. I stayed and watched while she changed Matt’s diaper. Mrs. Rice asked if I had done any babysitting. No I told her. She then started to explain what she was doing and why as she changed Mat’s diaper. When she was done, she asked if I had any questions on how to change a diaper. Not at this time, I told her. She asked me to carry Mat out to the family room and put him in the playpen then wash up for dinner. I did what she asked.

Dinner was meatloaf with peas and mashed potatoes, I think. Part way through dinner a foul smell wafted pass my noise. Mrs. Rice looked at Jack and asked him if he did stinky. Jack laughed at the question, I know, it was him. Mrs. Rice apologized, and got up and took Jack away. A few minutes later they returned and Jack had a fresh scent of baby power. We finished dinner and I cleared the table then thanked Mrs. Rice for dinner and said goodnight then went home.

When I got home, I checked the answering machine, nothing. I hung out, and watched some TV and listened to some music and played video games before going to bed. I had a hard time getting to sleep that night the house was to quiet.

Saturday watched cartoons, and had breakfast and hung out. About eleven o’clock mom called and gave me the telephone number for the hotel that they were staying at and their room number. Mom asked what I had planed to do today, I said, I did not know. She said that she left a list of jobs that I could/should do around the house. Mom asked. Is Scott coming over to our house or was I going over to Scott home. I told her that Scot went to visit his grandparents this weekend and that he only told me that at school on Friday. We talked some more and she reminded me to check in with Mrs. Rice and they loved me and to be good. After the telephone call from my mom, I found the list taped to the microwave oven. The first item was to clean up my room, second item was to do the laundry, and third item mow the grass if the weather was good and the last item was to do my homework. Well thanks to Mrs. Rice I could check off the last item, the others I would get around to them later maybe.

I went over to the Rice’s home to check in. I was invited to come in, and Mrs. Rice asked what I had planed to do today. I said that I was just going to hang out and maybe go to the video store and rent a movie or two. Mrs. Rice then asked if I had any plans for Sunday afternoon around the hours of two thirty and four. I asked her why, she said that she needed someone to baby-sit for her. I said, I guessed I was free to baby-sit. She said “Good”. We talked some more, and I let her know that I had talked to my mom earlier this morning.

Jack was due for a diaper change and Mrs. Rice had me change him. Jack got upset with me because I was taking too long to change his diaper. Mrs. Rice had to help me and said I did OK for my first try. Looking back on it I was just lucky that I did not tape my fingers to Jack’s diaper and the fact that it stayed on him was just plain luck too. After his diaper change, Jack and I played some game, as Mrs. Rice cleaned the house. I stayed for about three hours. Moreover, I got to change Jack’s diaper again, and got to change Mat too. I said my good-byes and that I would be over tomorrow in, time to baby-sit for her.

I left the Rice’s; I got on my bicycle and rode down to the video store and picked up some videos and then went next door and ordered a pizza for my dinner. With the pizza and the movies, I was set for the night. I know what your are think, a sixteen year old boy should be driving and not riding a bicycle. I have to wait until November before my mom and dad will take me to get my temporary license. This sucks big time.

Sunday was another do nothing day. I did baby-sit for Mrs. Rice and she paid me for it too. Mrs. Rice asked me to stay for dinner and I did. I was glad to get home thought, Mat had started crying and Mrs. Rice was cueing him and a like, but he just cried and cried, how can a baby cry that long with out taking a breath. I check my school bag and made sure, I had my homework in there for Monday. I then checked the school lunch calendar and found that lunch was fish sticks, spaghetti and mashed potatoes and Jell-O. Gross! I made my lunch for Monday and packed it in my school bag. I then watched some television and went to bed early that night.

Monday was a school day and Scott was back from visiting his grandparents. We had lunch together and set out plans for after school, which was to hang out at his house after school. Scott asked how my weekend went. I told him OK; I did leave out the amount of time that I spent at the Rice’s home. After school I went home with Scott we listened to some music and messed around. Scott’s mom asked if I would like to stay for dinner and I said sure. She than asked if I needed to call home and let my parents know that I would be staying for dinner, I told her they were out of town for the next few days, so no need to call them. After dinner Scott and I hung out some more it was about eight thirty when Scott’s mom said it was time that I left and for Scott to get started on his homework. I thanked Scott’s mom for dinner and told Scott that I would see him at school tomorrow. She was kind enough to drive me home; not that it was that far to walk.

When I got home, I checked in with Mrs. Rice. To say she was mad and upset with me would be a huge understatement. She asked if I thought it was to hard to pickup a telephone and let her know that I was over at a friend’s house. "No." I said and my mom would understand that I went over to Scott’s house after school. What is the big deal any ways. Oh boy did I find that was the wrong thing to say. The big deal was that my parents had given Mrs. Rice temporary custody over me. She pushed their letter granting her that right into my face. Mrs. Rice asked if I had any homework and if did was it done. I told her yes I have homework and I would be starting when I got home. She said, you better get started then, now go then. I wasted no time in leaving her front stoop. I did do my homework it only took an hour to do. I watched television until the eleven o’clock news came on. I then went to bed.

Tuesday … September 11, 2001 … What words can I use to describe today? The P.A. system in school broke the news to us about the aircraft hitting the World Trade Center not once but twice. We were all in shock and disheartened by the news. I was just numb and wanted to hear my parents voices to know that they were OK. It is just ten thirty in the morning and the school buses are there to take us home. Due to the events today they let us go home early. I went straight home, and turned on the television and watched the events being replayed, and hoping for a different outcome. It was late afternoon when I called the hotel, that my parents were staying at in New York City. I must have been lucky my call went through on the first try. I left a voice mail asking that they call home as soon as they got the message. I waited by the telephone for them to call back. It was dark outside when a knock came from the front door. I answered the door and it was Mrs. Rice, she asked if I was OK and had I heard from my parents! I said I was fine and had not heard from my parents. She asked if I had eaten any dinner. I said that I had not and I was not hungry. Mrs. Rice told me that I needed to eat, and that she would be back later to check on me. Mrs. Rice also told me to lock the front door. Sure, fine, OK was my answer. I went back to the chair next to the telephone, and sat down and willed the telephone to ring. It did not.

When I woke the next day I was still in the chair next to the telephone but someone had put a blanket over me. I rushed to my parent’s room hoping to find them there, but they were not. I skipped school today and sat by the telephone with the television on.

The next few days, weeks are a blur. I guess the fact that my parents have been killed in the attack has sunk in. My friend, Scott, I did not want to see him or his family it remained me too much of my lost. Scott was cool about it. I think he understands. I have talked with him and explained some of my feeling or should I say the feeling that guys will talk about with other guys.

Joyce, Mrs. Rice, had me move in with them. Andy helped move me in to their guest bedroom. He also took a few weeks of vacation so that they could get temporary custody of me and be my legal guardians. Children and Family Services wanted to place me in a shelter and Children and Family Services claimed that my parents are unfit to care for me. Children and Family Services stated that my parents leaving me home alone with no adult in charge is all the proof they need for the charge. The judge ruled that I was to stay with the Rice's. It was Jack, that called me his big brother and him asking the judge not to take me away, I think that did it. Joyce stated that I had fitted into their lives just as much as Jack and Matt. That I cared for the boys when she was busy, but that was not often and I would play with Jack for hours. Also since Jack had started potty training, he would follow me into the bathroom, and had stated using the toilet like a big boy with a few accidents. The judge also talked to Joyce and Andy without us "kids" around. The Rice's will not tell me what the judge asked or said to them. I do know that the judge ordered the case work to back off when he found out my parents were killed in the attack on the World Trade Center.

The pressure of losing my parents, the witch-hunt by Children and Family Services, and moving in to the Rice's home were just too much. I started wetting my bed and was very embarrassed by it. Joyce was very kind about it all. After the second wet night, a bag of Goodnites showed up in my bedroom the next day. That night Joyce asked that I wear them to bed until my problem dried up. Well the Goodnites were not that good, it was more like damp nights with the first bag. The second bag of new and improved, Goodnites show up just before the last one from the first bag was to be used. They were better than the first bag but no dry bed for me.

Half way through the second bag, it was a Monday night, Joyce asked to speak with me about my bedwetting after Jack was asleep. Talk about being embarrassed. Joyce said she understood that I did not want to talk about my bed-wetting. That ‘we’ and not ‘me’ had to come up with a solution to the problem of my bed-wetting no matter how embarrassing it might be. Yea, easy for her to say, she not the one wetting the bed. She said that looked to her that the Goodnites were leaking, was this because I did not get up and change it when “I knew it was wet?” I told her no. She then asked me if she should wake me up at two thirty or three in the morning when she changes Matt diaper, so I could change my Goodnites if it was wet or use the bathroom to stay dry. If you wish that, it would be fine was my answer to her. Would it do any good was her come back to me? “I do not know will it” was my answer back to her. Joyce told me the next move was up to me and ‘we’ needed to talk about it like adults and come up with a plan. Like any plan it needs to have a goal, the goal was for me to have a dry bed then to have dry nights, and she was willing to help me. She then asked what I wanted to try for the first part of the goal. I said let us try the waking me up. “That is a good start.” Joyce told me.

That night/morning Joyce woke me up. She asked if I was wet. I was soaking wet from head to toe, I also was having nightmares, and Joyce had awakened me in the middle of one of them. I got up to change my goodnight and pajamas because they were wet and to find that the bed was wet too. Joyce had gone and changed Matt and came back to my room since the light was still on. I had put on a fresh goodnight and was just putting a fresh T-shirt when Joyce walked in. She saw that the bedding was wet. She asked if the goodnight had leaked. It had I said hoping that she would go, but no, she help me strip the bed and remake it with fresh sheets. Joyce said that we needed to talk. I asked if it could wait. She said no. Dam I thought.

“Ken, I am so sorry, I did not know that the Goodnites fitted you so poorly.’ Joyce said.

“Ah”.

“Ken, would you be willing to try something different?” Joyce asked me as we made my bed.

“Like what?” I said with a very caution tone of voice.

“First let me say I know you are almost an adult and what I about to say might not sit well with you, would you be will to try a diaper.” Joyce said.

“Am no baby.” I told her.

“I did not say you were, but I can see that the Goodnites do not fit you and they leak because of that poor fit, an adult diaper would be bigger and fit you better. That’s all.” Joyce stated in a motherly tone.

“No, I said no.” I told her.

“Ken, I know this is hard for you, and I know this first hand because … well I to once was a bed wetter too.”

“No way, you are just saying that to get me into diapers.”

“No I am not, I am telling you the truth, thought it is something I am not proud of. I suffered with it for four years. My mom, at first punished me for wetting my bed that lasted for about six months. Then I saw a doctor about it, and my mom made sure that ever one on the doctor’s waiting room knew that I had been wetting my bed. The doctor did some test and found the problem. I had started school that year as one of the shorter kids and ended the school year as the tallies girl in my class. My balder and body were not keeping up with each other. So once, we knew why, then my mom set out a quest to stop my bed-wetting. I think I tried everything and it was no fun. As a last ditch effort, my mom diapered me. I was made to feel ashamed and embarrassed by her each night as she diapered me because I could not keep the bed dry that lasted for almost a year. I swore to myself that if I ever had children and they in turn, turned out to be a bed wetter that I help them the best I could. I would not embarrass them or make them feel ashamed because of this or any other problem. I know you are not my child but I want to help you.” Joyce said.

“If you really did put up with all of that why push the diapers?”

“As I see it, you have five options: One, do noting. Two, I could take you to the doctor’s and you can get the medication to stop wetting your bed, but Children and Family Services would find out and most likely bring it out in court. Three stay with the Goodnites. Four get you an alarm that will wake you up along with the rest of this house. And the fifth option, adult diapers. Even thought my mom made my life hell with the diapering my bed was dry.”

“If I were to try a diaper and I am not saying I am” I said, and was cut off in mid-sentence.

“If you were, you would put it on and take it off. I do not need a answer right now, but please think about it.”

“Goodnight, Ken, and have pleasant dreams.” With that, Joyce walked out of my room. I had to write down what she had said. However, I do not want to wear a diaper or a goodnight I really want is my old dry self back and my mom and dad too.

The next few nights were the same Joyce would wake me up on her way to Matt. But she did not bring the subject of me wearing diapers or any thing else. Joyce was doing what she said she would do. My supply of Goodnites was getting low, only two were left; I now had to make that dissection of what I was going to do.

That night when Joyce woke me up, I asked her to stop on her way back. I changed into my last goodnight and waited for Joyce to come back. Tonight it took her a long time to get back from caring for Matt. I asked if we could talk. Joyce stated she was very tired and could this wait until morning. I said no. She came in, sat down on my bed, and asked what can not wait until later. I said I must be nuts asking you this. “For the last few nights you have been get we up and I thank you for that but … umm … you … have not asked or talked to me about my dissection.”

“Because it is your dissection.” She said to me.

“I need some more information from you.” I said.

“OK, like what.”

“If I saw the doctor and got the medication, how would I know when to stop taking it.” I asked. “You stop and see what happens if you are dry and stay dry then you do not need it any more if not you keep taking it.” Joyce said.

“And the … di … dia …diaper?” I asked.

“Just like Jack and Matt a week of dry nights and you would be done with them.”

“Would Andy know about them?”

“I will not tell him unless you want me to, but I do feel that he should know and I would hope that you Ken would tell him.”

“I don't know about that.”

“Andy is a very good person, he will understand. Any thing else I need to get back to bed.”

“No.” I told her.

That morning as I left for school I flipped, a coin, heads - Goodnites, tales - diapers, on the side - see the doctor. The coin landed tales up. I took a deep breath; my fate had been decided I told Joyce quietly on my way out the door that I would try the diapers.

That night when I headed for bed Joyce stopped me and told me that she had put some supplies in my room along with the diapers. Joyce ran down the list of supplies that she got for me. Joyce also went over when to use the different items. The items are power, lotion, diaper rash cream, and bathroom size trash bags for my used diapers. She also said that she would wait outside my room while I put on my diaper just in case I had any problems or question. I shut the bedroom door while I put it on. I did not have any problems or questions. After I had my first real diaper on since being a baby, I opened the bedroom door. Joyce looked at me and asked if everything was OK. My answer was I think so. She asked if she could check my diaper to make sure I had done it correctly. I said fine. She told me I had done a good job of diapering myself and my bed should now be dry.

The next weekend just before Thanksgiving Andy was home and I did tell him about my wearing diapers at night. He was OK with it if I was OK with it and I was. He did not ask any questions or make any other comments about the bed-wetting or the diapers. I was happy for that but figured Joyce had filled him before I said anything, although she said she would not tell him.

Thing were going well until Christmas Eve, Joyce's mom, Pat, showed up. I had to share Jack's bedroom with Jack, as Pat would be sleeping in my room. Pat found my diapers in the bed room closet. I found out what Joyce had to put up with when she, use to wet her bed. Joyce had not told Andy about her childhood bed wetting problem but Pat did by let us all know about it even Jack. Then she started on me, since the size on the bag would only fit one person and it was me. She called me a baby to my face and asked if I need my diaper changed by an adult since babies can't change their own diapers. Andy stepped in and told her off. It was like watching a dogfight but Andy went for the kill shot early. And that was she was a guest in our home and she could visit any time, as long as she wore a diaper and we all could make fun of her.

“Yes, Ken, has a problem and he made an adult dissection to wear diapers.” Andy stated.

Andy's last words to Pat were. "Don't come back until you have the Christmas spirit." Anyway Pat left after the fight and I got my room back for Christmas

Christmas morning my diaper was dry, I had not wet myself. Joyce knocked on my door and said that they were going to open gifts. I did not change out of my diaper but went to open Christmas gifts. Jack, Matt and myself opened our Christmas gifts with our diapers on. I got some new clothes and a CD that I wanted. The last gift box that Joyce and Andy handed me had only my name on it and did not list from whom it was from. Andy said it was from all of them to me. I thanked them all before opening it. It was an X-box, I had said in passing that it was cool and wanted to play one but never thought I would get it as a gift. At this point my bladder was full and I just wet my diaper. I think my face may have shown something because Joyce said it was time to change Jack and Matt's diapers as she looked me straight in the eyes. I got up and went back to my room and got cleaned up and dressed for the day, I wanted to wear a diaper for the rest of the day, but did not. Jack was now in pull-up during the day and he had been very good about going potty in the potty like his new big brother. If he is good and does not have an accident this week he will be in big boy underwear by New Years Day.

Late that day the doorbell rang and it was Pat, she apologized for yesterday and, how sorry she was for what she had said to me and that she was out of place for doing it. The rest of the day went well, even Christmas dinner. A little, after Jack was put to bed, Pat said that she should be going. That was fine by me even thought she was nice to me I still felt her disapproval for being their and my bed-wetting problem.

Both Andy and Joyce asked if I had plans for New Years Eve and I did not, they asked if I would baby sit for them that night. Sure, why I asked. The neighborhood was having a small adults only New Years Eve party, and they wanted to go.

Between Christmas and New Years most of my nights were dry, even thought I did not want diapers in the first place I had grown to like them. I think Joyce knew that my need for diapers was end, but would she understand my want for diapers. Why do I think that, maybe it is her mom instinct or maybe I said something? When she asked how I was doing, or did I need more supplies, or because I was not talking to her about my problem. This may just be my fear for liking diapers.

New Years Eve evening, Andy and Joyce felt for the party after Jack was in bed and Matt was a sleep in his crib. I got my self ready for bed at eight forty five that is to say my diaper was on and my pajamas were on too. I sat down and watched a movie on one of the cable channels, with a large glass of soda pop. After the movie, Matt started to cry so I got his bottle and took to him. Matt first needed his wet and soiled diaper changed before his bottle, which I did. My diaper was wet too but I did not change it. After Matt was done with his bottle, I put him back into his crib and he went back to sleep luck for me. I set Matt bottle in the kitchen sink, I had a strange urge, and it was to try a bottle. So I took a clean bottle, filled it with milk, put the nipple on it, and went back to the family room. The eleven o'clock news was on so I drank from the bottle. I took me a while but I did finish the bottle. I set the bottle down on the floor next to the chair I was sitting in as Dick Clark Rocking New Years Eve telecast started. I watched as 2001 ended and thought about all that happened that year and I started to cry. Happy Year I heard Dick Clark say, welcome to 2002. I flipped channels, found an another movie, and started to watch it.

The next thing I know Joyce is waking me up to go to bed. I kicked the empty bottle that I had set on floor earlier and Joyce bent down to pick it up. She must have gotten a whiff of my wet diaper. She asked but more like told me that my diaper was wet. I found this out later that day. I don't know what I said but Joyce changed my diaper. By the time my brain realized what was happening I got the biggest and hardest erection I ever had and then was total embarrassed by it all. Joyce saw the look on my face and said it was OK, I was just like Jack and Matt down there, just bigger that all. She continued to rub in the lotion on my penis, she stopped just before it was too late to control it and I would have really been embarrassed if I had had an orgasm. Next came the power and finally the diaper. What a rush! With my diaper on, Joyce then put my pajama bottoms back on me, helped me into bed, and tucked me in. I said ‘goodnight mom.’ She bent over, kissed my forehead, and said goodnight sweetie, happy dreams. On her way out she turned off the lamp and closed my bedroom door. Once the door was closed, I finished what she had started; it did not take long for me to reach ejaculation. That was the first time I had masturbated in my diaper. Once I had come, I went to sleep.

January 1, 2002 - New Years Day was a big day for Jack not because it was a New Year but because today was his first day in big boy underwear. I felt weird each time Jack would say that he is now like his dad and big brother because he was in his big boy underwear. He was glad to be in his underwear, and I wanted to be in a diaper, how odd could that be.

Later that day I had a private moment with Joyce and I blushed as I thanked her for changing my diaper last night or earlier this morning. She just smiled at me with a, your welcome smile, but the smile had a hint of something else there too. She told what had happened as stated above. The moment was broken with a cry from Matt, and yell by Jack, and a shout from Andy who was watching the football games in the television. Joyce asked if I would take care of Matt and she would care for Jack. Matt was awake from nap, wanted out of crib, and was in need of a diaper change too. I changed Matt's diaper and told him how lucky he was to have such a good mommy. I also told him how lucky he was to be in diapers and to hold on to them as long as he could, I knew he still had eighteen months or so to be in diapers. After I had changed Matt I carried him out to the family room and put him in the playpen. I then got a bottle of juice for him to have inside the playpen with him. I started to watch the game with Andy and that only lasted for a few minutes. I went to my room and played a game on my x-box.

That evening I said goodnight to Joyce and Andy, went to my room, and was getting ready for bed. A knock on my bed room door and I said come in. It was Joyce, She said that she had over heard what I had said to Matt, and my heart sank.

“Thank you for think that I am a good mother.” Joyce said.

“You are.” I stated, hoping she did not hear the next part.

“Ken you know that we go back to court tomorrow.” She said.

“I know.” I said.

The court was going to hear two items, one a change of custody from temporary to permanent and two, liquidation of my parent’s property. The selling of the house I use to live in. Joyce asked me if was OK with it. Sort of, I told her. It means the end of hope that my parents will come home and because of that, I get a new family. It's not fair!!!

“Do you not like this family?” Joyce asked me.

“I do it’s just … just … you know different and not fair that all.” Joyce gave me a hug and said goodnight to me.

January 2, 2002 Wednesday, Pat came over to baby sit Jack and Matt as Joyce, Andy and me went back to court. Judge Wright was hearing the case today. Court started as normal, well from what I had been through before and from watching television. Ms. Carol Brown from Children and Family Services (CAFS) “the witch” was there. CAFS still did not like the fact that I was under the care of the Rice’s. Their reasons she stated were one, the lack of age difference between Mr. and Mrs. Rice and me. The difference is only ten years, and it needs to be more so it would be a truer parent child relationship so they claim. Two, the fact that I am older than Jack by fourteen years and I should be placed with someone who has or had child of my age. Third, the Rice’s have not been fully truthful to CAFS. Case in point being that I wear diapers to bed because I am a bed wetter and a simple visit to a doctor was not done. I was so embarrassed by the fact that my bed wetting and diaper wearing was brought up in court and now it is part of the court records. Judge Wright thanked Ms. Brown for her report to the court. Judge Wright asked some questions to Ms. Brown, one of them being my placement into a foster care. The home CAFS had planed for me to go to was on the other side of the county, and I would have to transfer to different high school. The judge questioned Ms. Brown about a family with in my current school district. She stated that CAFS feels that is best that I be moved to a new area, where I could get a fresh start. The judge asked her what if my parents where to show up how would they find me. Ms. Brown answer was that my parents in the eyes of CAFS and the law were unfit parents. Judge Wright said that the law is what he says it is in his court. Ms Brown pointed her finger at the judge and said, “What I say goes here the law backs me up not you. We are taking that child and you have no right to interfere with the job CAFS does!” With that, Judge Wright called for a 20-minute recess, Ms. Brown he wanted to see in his chambers right now.

After the recess it was just Judge Wright, the bailiff /court reporter, Joyce, Andy, and myself. Judge Wright stated for the record that Ms. Brown, was being held in contempt of court, and was not present in the courtroom. I wanted to jump for joy because the witch got hers. Judge Wright asked some questions about my problem, which I was too embarrassed to answer, but Joyce did answer. The judge also asked what I liked about living with the Rice’s. That turned out to be a harder question to answer than I thought.

“That the rules were about the same as what my parents had, and it was nice to have two brothers, thought it would be nice if they were older so I would have someone to play with. Joyce and Andy, I mean Mr. and Mrs. Rice, have done so much to make me part of their family that it is hard to point this item or that item as good or bad.” I stated.

The judge asked if I called them by their first names. “Yes”, I said, both Joyce and Andy stated that they had given me permission to call them by their first names. The judge asked me if I had any living relatives. “Yes, one but she is in extended care home in a different state.” I told the judge. He was the first to ask that question.

“How old are you?” The judge asked.

“Sixteen”, I said.

He asked if I had my driver’s license. I hung my head and said “No, my mom and dad had said that we would be going in November of last year but.”

“Why the wait?” Judge Wright asked.

“My parents wanted to make sure my grades were up.” I stated.

“And what were your grades like before this break.” Judge asked.

“CAFS got a copy of my last report card.” I said.

“I am asking you.” The judge stated.

“Better than when I lived with my mom and dad, because Mrs. Rice makes sure that I do my homework.”

“What about the missed days from school?” Judge Wright asked.

“That was just after September 11 and was waiting for my parents to call.” I told him with tears running down my face.

“OK Ken, please wait outside.” The judge told me.

I left the courtroom and sat down on a bench in the hallway. The Rice’s and the judge were in the courtroom for an hour before I was asked to join them. Mrs. Smith for CAFS also joined us. Judge Wright gave us his decision. “One, Andy Paul Rice and Joyce Melanie Rice have full custody over the minor child named Kenneth Wily Kelly as long as items two and three are meet. Two, Said minor child is to be seen by a medical doctor for his bed wetting problem with in seven days and to report back to this court with the findings of that exam. Three, Said minor child is to go in therapy with a licensed psychiatrics for help in dealing with the loss of his natural parents, adjusting to his new family, and if need for his bed wetting. Four, All real assets from the minor child parent’s estate shall be sold at fair market value. Including but not limited to the house, cars, household furnishings, stocks, and bonds. The minor child will get full control over the funds at age twenty-three if no death certificate is issued before then. If a death certificate is issued and the minor child is of legal age then he will at that time, have full control over the funds. Five, Mr. and Mrs. Rice will be given an allowance from the estate that covers room and board, health insurance for this minor child, and cash of one hundred dollars per month until the minor child turns of legal age. The court will set the amount for room and board each year. The health insurance is at actual cost paid. The one hundred dollars a month is to cover clothing and other miscellaneous expenses in caring for this minor child. Six, An allowance up to the total actual cost paid for educational expenses, including but not limited to school field trips, collage fees, and books to be paid from said funds. Seven, Any medical expenses or supplies not covered by health insurance will be paid from said fund. Eight, The last item Andy Paul Rice is charged with over seeing this fund and will report each year to the court a full accounting of all monies in the fund and both income and expenditures of the fund.”

“Any questions.” The judge asked.

“Can I keep some of my parents things, like photos and some other things to remember my mom and dad by?”

“Yes you can.” Judge Wright said.

“What about one of the cars.” I asked.

“No.” He told me. I wanted to ask why but did not. I did ask about the age thing. Judge Wright stated that this state had a seven-year waiting period before someone could be declared legally dead. So on September 12, 2008 the courts would declare my parents legally dead unless other proof was brought forth to the court that my parents were either dead or live. Mrs. Smith asked a question about CAFS roll until I turn of legal age. Judge Wright stated that CAFS roll in this case has ended unless One, I did not comply with items two and three of his ordered. Or two, the failure of Mr. Rice to over see the fund correctly. Three, CAFS can not go on a witch-hunt to find or to try to break up this family unit. And that Ms. Brown is off this case he stated to Mrs. Smith.

It was just past one o'clock when we got home. Joyce made lunch for us and Pat filled her in on what they did. Pat asked what happened today and Joyce said thing worked out well but did not go into any detail. After lunch Pat left and Joyce then called her, and it turned out to be mine, pediatrician Dr. Mark, it turn out the first non-emergency appointment was on Monday at three o'clock. The nurse asked what the problem was Joyce said that I was wetting the bed and we needed to get it check out. The nurse asked how long I had been wetting the bed Joyce told her about eleven weeks. Well we got an appointment that day, it was the last one of the day, and it was at six o'clock.

We showed up at the pediatrician office just before six. Jack was a little upset because the last time he saw Dr. Mark he got a shot and did not like. The nurse had me follow her back to one of the exam room. She asked that I get undressed and put on a gown and that the doctor would be in shortly. Dr. Mark was in before I had change into the gown. He gave me full physical, blood work, pee in the cup, looked in all the openings. He asked some question about my bed-wetting and I told him it was getting better. He did a few tests that were not, the most friendly. The final ruling, nothing physically wrong with me and I should be dry at night. Andy and Joyce were there to hear that. They asked that it be put in writing for the court. Dr. Mark said he would write it up after the last of the test came back and would fax it to the court. He asked if we wanted a prescription for or some samples of some drugs that would make me dry at night. I said no, and no it was. Dr. Mark did tell me that one percent of all sixteen-year-olds wet the bed and it should pass. Joyce asked if Dr. Mark could recommend a good child psychiatrics for me, to help deal with the lost of my parents. He recommended Dr. Le Ta and he would have is nurse setup the first appointment because Dr. Ta is not currently taking any new patients just referrals and he would include that in his letter to the court.

The appointment for Dr. Ta was two weeks away and at four o'clock in the afternoon so I would not have to miss any school.

In weeks between seeing Dr. Mark and before seeing Dr. Ta, things were going well. I was given time alone in my former home to find the items that I wanted to keep. The house had sat empty of life and had a cold feeling about it. The plants that my mom had grown were dead from the lack of care. Although this was home, I felt like a stranger in it. Most of my things were already over at my new home but what was not I boxed up to take over. I did not have much time to go through every thing, with real estate agents coming to look at the place and people who do estate and auction sales listing and assigning prices to each item. I must say that one of the women from the estate and auction sales was kind enough to box up the items that my mom kept of my childhood, like report cards, school pictures, my baby teeth and a like. Why to mother keep such things?

Also during this time I had started to hang out with Scott more, it is as if life is falling back into place, and by hanging out with Scott I meet a girl who’s name is Mary. We had known each other from the start of the school year because we had the same first four periods together, but now we only have one period together. We are just friends for how, but she thinks it cool that I have two little brothers that I help care for. Odd thing at the start of the school year she would not even talk to me now we are like long lost friend.

Mary was over at my ‘new’ home and we were doing our homework in my room. We were doing our homework in there because of Jack. It was not that Jack was bad, he was just full of energy, and we needed some quite to study. I asked Mary if she wanted something to drink and she did. So I went to get us some soda pop. When I came back to my room my heart dropped. Mary had gone into my closet and had found a sweater of mine because she was cold; the problem was that the draw the sweater was in was right next to my bag of diapers. Mary saw the look on my face and said she hoped I did not mind her wearing my sweater. I said no, not at all, or some like that. She said nothing about the diapers and I did not want to start something over them. We drank our drinks and finished our homework. When Mary was about to leave she took off my sweater and handed back to me. I helped her with her coat and walked her to the door. She gave me a little kiss on my cheek and said that she would see me in school tomorrow. Joyce asked what brought about a kiss I just blushed.

January 15, 2002 Tuesday. I feared going to school today, because I feared that Mary might have told her friend what she saw in my closet yesterday. I meet up with Scott at school and we talked as we walked to our first class. He said, that he had heard from his girlfriend that Mary real liked me. I asked if he heard anything else. No he said, but he did want to know what I had done to get her to like me so much so quickly. I said that I did not know other than act like a gentleman that got a good laugh out of Scott.

At lunch, I sat at a table by myself when two of Mary’s friends asked if they could join me. I said that they could. One of the girls stated that I was Mary’s first boyfriend and if did anything to hurt her I was dead meat.

“Mary and I, were just study partners.” I stated.

“Yea”, the other girl said it turned out her name was Jill, “just like the other boy’s in this school to dumb to come in out of the rain, we will spell it out to you.”

“Mary is a girl and you are a boy, that makes you Mary’s boyfriend and Mary is your girlfriend.” the two of them said unison.

“Do you understand that?” They asked.

“What ever, we are just friends that all.” I told them.

“Well Mary likes you, but I do not see why.” Said Beth; She is the other girl.

“Since we are good friends with Mary, and Mary likes you we will be nice to you, but hurt her or dump her then watch out.” Jill stated then punched me in the arm. Girl or not she hit me so hard, that spot turned black, blue, and yellow.

Last class of the day. The class that Mary is in with me. She asked if she could come over and we could do our homework together. I told her not today, because I had a doctor’s appointment after school. She asked which doctor I was seeing with a hint of something in her voice. I told her a doctor, OK. She was upset that I would not tell her who or what type of doctor. She told me to call her when I got home. I said I would.

After school, I saw doctor, Ta. I guess for shrink he is OK, he wants to know how I feel. I am guy why would I talk about my feels and in that child’s playroom he called his office, come on get real. I felt out of place and did not want to talk to him. He asked about my parents, and if I miss them. What a dumb ass question to ask. There was a lot of quiet time in that session. He did talk to Joyce in private for about ten minutes.

On the way home, Joyce stated that for this to work I had to open-up to doctor Ta, so that I could start to heal and that the session cost me one hundred and fifty dollars each time.

“That much, and he treated me like a two year old.” I said with an angry tone in my voice

“Were you acting like a two year old?” Joyce asked.

“No.” I snapped back

“"Then why do you think he treated like a two year old?”

“"Did you see that room, it was setup for little kids?”

“Yes I did see the room and maybe it was a little young for you, but you do play with Jack’s toys.”

“Maybe I do, but Jack is there and that makes it different.” I said with a frustrated tone.

“Ken, forget the room and how it is setup that is not important, focus on the point that you need to talk to doctor Ta about your feelings.” Joyce said in a calm but motherly tone.

“Guys don’t talk about their feelings. What am I to say, that am upset, angry, how about pissed off that it happened to me.”

“That would be a good starting point. Am I sure doctor Ta can help you work through those feelings and others when you reach them and find ways to express them.” Joyce said in a calm voice.

By this time, we were home and our talk ended. I was in a foul mood and just went to my room Jack wanted me do to something with him. I just shut him out. That may not have been fair to Jack but I needed some time by myself to work my feelings out.

At dinner Jack shied away from me, Joyce asked if I was done sulking for the day, I said I was. I asked Jack what he wanted to tell or show me only to have him run and hide behind his mother. Oh boy was I in the dog house big time with Jack and Joyce.

The next few days thing were back to normal, well almost normal.

Friday, January 18. Second, visit to the shrink. The ‘playroom’ had changed, all the little kid stuff was stacked in one corner of the room and an adult size table with two nice chairs was in the center of the room, this is where we sat. I talked most of the hour, about my parents, the Rice’s, and I even touched on my bed-wetting problem. I ask a question about why is office on Tuesday look more like a day care center than an office. I found out that Fridays and Saturdays are when he sees his older patients like me, and that made me feel better.

When I got home, Jack talked to me. He had not talked to me since Tuesday.

“You going to be nice to me?” Jack asked Jack in a shy voice.

“I will be nice to you Jack.”

“You sure you be nice to me.” Jack said.

“Yes I am sure.”

“Play cars with me.”

“OK, I play cars with you.”

Jack had his toy cars out and had made a city with his blocks. Jack took the bright red sports car of course. I got the “family” car. Jack zoomed around his town in his sports car. I just keep my car out of Jack’s way. One of Jack’s buildings was taller than the other ones and I had to get up to move my car around this building. That was when I saw something inside that building. I asked Jack what was inside that building, he said I had to play cars with him first. We played for about ten more minutes before Joyce whispered something to Jack ear. Jack answer was “we play cars first.” Jack parked his car in front of the tall building, and then he hit the building and the building blocks crashed to the floor. In side was the study guide for getting your temporary drivers’ license. Joyce told me, that Andy would be taking me to the testing center on Saturday, February 2. I went and did my homework after calling Scott and telling him that I was going to get my temporary drivers’ license! I found out that Scott was going that same day to get his, he had keep it a secret form me because he knew that it was a very sore subject with me.

Joyce went to bed early to night, and I got my diaper on and stayed up to study for the drivers license test. I was thirsty and went to the kitchen to get a glass of milk, instead of a glass I used one of Matt’s bottles. It was sitting on the counter begging me to use it. I took it back to my room and drank from the bottle as I studied. Before turning in for the night I played with myself by rubbing my diaper, though it felt good it was not the same as the first time.

Saturday, January 19. I am dead! Joyce came into my room this morning and found the empty baby bottle.

“Dear diary,

Ken is now Kenny at least for this weekend. Today he confessed to some very weird feeling. Kenny likes his diapers and wants to drink from a bottle. As I am a good mother, I fear that my other children and I will not understand why a child who has been on this earth sixteen years wishes to be treated like a baby. I know that he has not been a happy child of late, so I will put aside my feelings and for fill his wishes. When I asked him what he wanted, he shook with fear and answered in a voice not clear. His eyes could not look into mine. Mommy (Joyce)

P.S. I have no plans to read this his diary, but I do feel as his mommy that I must note what happened today.”

Monday January 21. Well I am not dead. This last weekend was like a roller coaster ride. Friday night using one of Matt’s bottles was like the first hill, a slow rise to the top of the hill. Saturday morning when Joyce walked in to my bedroom and found me with a bottle was like being on the top of the first hill looking down. Still being held back because the last car has not cleared the lift chain, that one moment of knowing what comes next but not sure when. And the questions did come; Joyce was not dumb, she stated that she knew things. Fear came over me, what had I said that night that she changed me, or had she overheard me telling Matt to enjoy his diapers while he could. What exactly did she know? Her next question was very hard, and I was told not to lie for she would know. At that point, I knew what I had to do, as fear took over me, the only things I had to hold on to were truth and broken trust. I told her all but could not look her in the eye I began to cry.

Joyce told me that she would treat me just like Matt that meant I would be playing with Matt’s toy and Matt. I would be eating what Matt was eating; drinking the same thing as Matt drank including formula. Nap when Matt took his nap, etc., etc., and my diaper would be check from time to time and changed as need. In addition, I was to call her Mommy. The first thing was to take off my pajamas and next was to change my wet diaper. This was different than the first time that Joyce changed my diaper, not that it was bad but the rest of my diaper changes for this past weekend were very mater of fact. That first time seemed so kind, but I had not asked her to change me to the best of my knowledge. Now, well this last weekend, my diaper changes are by my request not that I could ask to be changed, but was as needed when she would check me. The whole weekend was odd, being fed, and bathed, drinking from a bottle all under the very watchful eyes and hands of my new mother. I was and am still am very embarrassed by it all. But maybe it was for the best as this past weekend was the estate/auction of the contents of my former home, and this is my new start on life.

Friday, January 25. I think some of Pat’s hate for Joyce’s bedwetting is comes through in Joyce, now at night she calls me her big baby boy. I blush each time I hear it and I have asked her not to call me that, but she still does. I have been going to bed with a bottle each night, that is now a rule I guess, and I have not had a dry night since. I guess in a way I am her big baby boy, now that Jack is out of diapers both day and night.

Jack, that kid was so quick at telling Mary that he is now my big brother because he is big boy and is potty trained and I am not. Mary asked me about Jack’s statement, did he mean the diapers that were in the closet. I just died, what could I say other than ‘yes’ if I had said no Jack may have told all. I did ask Mary why she took such a quick liking to me. She liked me because I did not freak out, when I knew that she had seen the bag diaper in my closet. And she thought I was cute. Plus I got along well with Jack and Matt. I found out after much blushing and embarrassment on both sided, that she had been a bed wetter too, but she did not use diapers for her problem. I do not know if what she said is true or not, but by the way she acted, it might be she did use diapers for her bedwetting or may still be a bed wetter.

My bigger problem is Andy. My fear that Joyce had told him about last weekend, and my request to be treated like a baby. I found out that she had told him about it. Andy had a very long talk with me that I wish to forget. He is so afraid of my wanting to be babied that he fears that I will hurt his sons or them seeing me being babied will hurt them. Andy is very upset with me, he wanted to know how and why this, my wanting to be treated as a baby came about. I don’t think that he liked any of my answers. And I am not sure what will happen next. I do know this; I am grounded, and have to stay in my room out of his sight. I am very scared… The last thing Andy said as he walked out of my room, was that was going to call CAFS and have them take me away. I may not be taking the test for my temporary permit for a long, long time or be doing much else.

Saturday, January 26. Dear journal, Saw the shrink today with Andy and Joyce. The main topic was my wanting to be babied. Very, very embarrassing having to say what I like and dislike about being babied point by point and why. I also had to explain again how this came about. Its not like I wanted to happen it just did. I am feeling sorry for myself right now and very sleepy. Dr. Ti wrote a set of prescriptions for some medication that I how have to take. The medication is to help me to over come my wanting to be babied. If this is what getting high is like, no thank you. Also my diapers are gone even at night, as is my bottle, and video games this to is to help me grow up, so states Andy. Still grounded, not sure if Andy has talked to CAFS, I really do like living here. Sorry have to sleep now, the medication is making me so sleepy.

Monday, January 28. I am in a fog; my mind is so not here. My teachers kept asking if I was feeling OK today. How does one feel OK? Had a test today in school, Mrs. Brown, one of my teachers wants to meet with Joyce and Andy tomorrow to talk about test. Saw Mary she asked if I was using drugs because I was acting so dumb. I told her the doctor had given me a prescription for some medication to help with my behavior, but not which behavior. Oh so sleepy, I don’t feel

Saturday, February 2. I got out of the hospital today. I had a very bad reaction to the medication and almost died, so the doctors said at the hospital. The last thing I remember is writing in my journal Monday night, the next thing is waking up in the hospital with tubes all around and in me and Andy by my bedside. The breathing tube came out shortly after I was a wake Wednesday night or Thursday morning. Andy said that everything will be OK, just do what the doctors and nurses say.

The rest of the stuff was taken out today, including the catheter into my bladder. The nurse said that I should wear a diaper for the trip home because I would have very little or no warning when I would need to pee. I looked at Joyce and Andy they nodded that it was OK. I said OK, and the nurse drew the curtain closed and removed the catheter, and then diapered me.

Tommy the kid in the next bed started to tease me and make jokes about me being diapered. Tommy had been in an accident with a car, and the police had ticketed Tommy for the accident, since he caused the accident. Tommy had a broken leg and two broken arms. It was too bad that his mouth was not broken too. The nurse got a devilish smile on her face as she opened the curtain, and stated he was next, to be diapered. Tommy yelled. “No way am I going to wear a diaper, I am not a baby, you can’t diaper me if I don’t want it!” I have to smile as I write this. She did diaper Tommy and did it for all of us to see. I at least I had the curtain closed for my diapering, but not Tommy. The nurse told Tommy not to act like such a baby or they would start to treat him like a baby, and that would not be hard since the nursery was just down the hall. The nurse also injected some drug into Tommy’s IV line when she was done. She said it would help him to relax. Tommy’s mom showed up about five minutes later. He complained to his mom that the nurse had put a diaper on him and he wanted it taken off, right now. His mom took a quick look at his diaper and said that she would find a nurse to change him. Tommy said I not need a change. I want the dam diaper off me. Just then, the nurse came in with the wheelchair so I could go home. Tommy’s mom stated that her son’s diaper was soaked and needed to be changed. The look on his face was priceless; it was shock and disbelief. The nurse said someone would back to change him. Tommy kept saying that he did not wet the diaper he just wanted it taken off. I was helped into the wheelchair and taken down to the lobby where my ride home was waiting. She, the nurse, was correct and I did wet myself on the way home with next to no warning, thank goodness, for the diaper, I was wearing.

Mary had baby sat for Joyce and Andy so that they could bring me home from the hospital. I felt every odd being in a diaper, let a lone a wet diaper in front of Mary although I was dressed. Mary kissed me and gave me a big hug, she had to have heard the crinkling sounds of the disposable diaper I was wearing, but she said nothing about it. She did tell me about the homework assignment that was due on Monday and other thing that had happened at school the past week.

Scott came by also, he wanted to know what had happen to me and filled me in what had happened last week at school. Scott showed me his temporary license and stated that he got a 98 on the test but his mom and dad would not let him drive the car home from the testing center.

The real big news items are: 1.) My old home is sold, to a family with two young kids. And 2.) My diapers and baby thing are back. I think Andy had a change of heart, or Joyce had a talk with him, or my stay in the hospital did it, or maybe he read my journal, I do not know, and I don’t care why or how the change took place. I am just glad they are back, not that I am going to ask Andy to baby me. Oh the other good news is my drivers’ test has been moved to next Saturday and Joyce will take me, and I am not grounded any more.

Sunday, February 3. Stayed diapered all day today, Andy said it would be best if I did. It seemed odd that he would make that request, but it did give me more time to catch up on my homework. Jack wanted to be next to me all day. He stayed close by and colored most of the day; I guess my going to hospital upset him. Jack was also in diapers today, I don’t how or why he was in diapers but he was. The big surprise today was the family that will be moving into my old home, they stop by to introduce them self’s. The Williams, Earl and Gladys and their two girls, Mindy age 7 and Marcia age 5 nice people but only meet with them for a few minutes. I was to old, and Jack and Matt were too young for them.

Monday, February 4. The teachers were very nice to me today at school; Mrs. Brown let me retake the test from January 28, this time I got a 96. Oh the homework. Well it’s late and tomorrow is an another school day.

Friday, February 8. Mary and I had a date tonight, and Joyce helped in pulling it off. Mary’s parents were going out but I could not go over to her house, parent’s rule. So Joyce called and asked if Mary’s mom if Mary could baby sit, because Joyce and I had some place go to. Mary’s mom said that it was OK for Mary to baby sit. Mary’s mom dropped Mary at our house a little after five o’clock as requested. Joyce then dropped Mary and me at the Olive Garden Restaurant where the two of us had dinner. After dinner, we saw a movie, we sat in the far back corner of the Movie Theater and kissed, and I felt her breasts after she asked me to. She moved my hand to between her legs. She then placed her hand down the front of my pants and played with my penis, I had that feeling just like the first time Joyce diapered me, I asked Mary to stop but it was to late. What a thrill and total embarrassment at the same time, Mary seemed to like it too.

We left the movie and took a taxicab back to my house, and Joyce then took Mary home. Joyce did ask how are date went after taking Mary home, I just blushed. She said that she better give me the ‘birds and the bees talk’ which she did with little to no blushing on her part. After her talk she said I should go to bed, that tomorrow was my big day. I said that I need a drink first.

“Do you want that in a bottle sweetie?” asked Joyce.

“No, a glass will work.”

“Are you sure you don’t want a nice bottle that you can go to bed with.” Joyce said in a very nice motherly tone of voice.

“Fine I’ll take a bottle as long as I can still go for my temp tomorrow.”

“Good, I will get your bottle but first lets get you ready for bed sweetie.” Said Joyce as she started to undress me.

“I can do this.” I stated.

“I know, but mommy will get you ready for night, night. OK?” Joyce said.

What am I going to say, ‘ah NO mommy I can do it.’ Don’t think so, not with Joyce now in mommy mode no way. She had my shirt and now my pants off, and the semen stains showing on the front of my underwear. How embarrassed I was I can not put in words.

“Well!” stated Joyce as she slid my underwear off my body and had me lay down on my bed.

She used a baby wipe to clean up the dry and crusty semen that was on my body and penis. The action of her touching and wiping my penis I got a very hard and throbbing erection.

“Ken, control yourself.” Joyce warned.

I said with a strain in my voice. “You are making that … very … hard … to do.”

“Well you better, or no drivers test tomorrow for you if you can’t.” Joyce said with a slight smile as she gave me little smack on the side of my left leg.

“Please don’t, I … I … am … trying. Oh God, please stop.” I stated as I push away her hand.

“Oh…, Ken I am sorry! I thought you were just joking.” Joyce said with a blush of red coming across her face “Sweetie, I am so sorry, I did meant to do that!”

Joyce, with the speed that only a mother has, had my diaper on me and I was not able to ‘control myself’ any longer as her hand pushed the front of the diaper up to my stomach. I could feel the warmth and the force of my semen being shoot out from my penis and into my diaper. Joyce taped my diaper shut with out a hint of just what had happened. She left me lying on my bed naked except for my diaper as she went to get my bottle.

Joyce came back with a bottle of milk; she sat down on my bed and had me place my head in her lap. She then placed the warm damp nipple in my mouth and I started to suckle while she held the bottle. With her free hand, she lightly stroked the top of my head while she humming a lullaby.

After my bottle was empty Joyce got my pajamas, put them on me, and then put me to bed. It felt more like how she treats Matt at bedtime and I wished it did not have to end. She gave me a goodnight kiss and wished me happy little dreams.

Saturday, February 9. Today was both a good day and a bad day. I will start with the bad, my grandmother is not doing well, and they are not sure how long she will live. The nursing home suggested that I come out and say my good-byes. The good news is I got my temporary driver’s license, and I got 100% correct. I got to drive the mini van around the block and then to McDonalds for lunch, since Jack and Matt were with us.

Joyce called Andy and told him about my grandmother after we got the call from the nursing home. Andy will meet me when I arrive in, as my flight will get in ten minutes later than his. I have thrown some clothes in a bag and will be off to the airport in just a few minutes so I will not be writing for while.

Tuesday, February 12. I saw my grandma, she was wake when we got to the nursing home but it was after visiting hours when we arrived so the nurse took us to see her. She was doing real well and I questioned why we were called, I would find that out later why. Grandma had some papers and photos, and a key that she wanted we to have. We talked some before she drifted to sleep. The nurse asked that we stay as her time was near. We stayed there that night, by her bedside. About three A.M. Sunday morning is when she passed on to the next life. I got very little sleep that night and was dry too.

Her wishes were spelled out on one the papers that she had given me earlier and that helped a lot. Andy and I meet a gentleman Sunday morning at seven sharp coming to see my grandma at the nursing home, his name was Ed Whetstone, he was very sorry to hear that my grandmother had passed a way. He asked in a whisper, if we had the key. Both Andy and I wanted to know why he was asking. He said that he would take us to breakfast and we could talk there. At breakfast we found out that the key fit a lock on a storage shed that had the only asset my grandmother had hidden from the nursing home, since they took they rest. It was a 1990 Buick with just over ten thousand miles on it, and it was mine now.

After breakfast Ed took us to the storage place where the car was, it was inside all washed and waxed with a full tank of gas, current license plates and the title was on the front seat. My grandmother had signed the car over to me for love and money of one dollar. She had done that on my sixteenth birthday. Ed told both Andy and I not to say a word about the car around the nursing home because they would want the cash for the car or the car.

We were done; everything had been taken care of. Andy and I thanked Mr. Whetstone for all that he had done and set off for the drive home in my car. The drive home took two days. The first day was a short day because of the lack of sleep that both Andy and I had from the night before. It was a good way for us to get to know each other.” I hope that someday Jack and Matt will be able to get to know their dad like I do now.

Scott may have had his license before me, but I now have more time behind the wheel and mile and my own car than Scott does. Thank you grandma, sorry we could not spend more time together, please say hello to my mom and dad and let them know I am OK and I love them.

Monday, February 18. Laid grandma to rest today. It was a small service just like she wanted. Mary, Scott and all of the Rice’s were there but I sat in front church pew all by myself. I am the last one a live in my family. That shocking truth has hit me. Why!?!

Thursday, March 7. Dear journal, it has been a while since I written in you. Today was Jack’s third birthday, and we had a party for him with a few other kids. Of the other kid at the party Jack was the only one not in diapers. One kid was four years old and still in diapers full time; his mom was surprised that Jack was potty trained. Joyce stated that having a big brother helped in Jack’s potty training. Matt had a good time; he got more cake on his face and the floor than into his mouth but that is the joy of being less than a year old. Mary had come over for the birthday party also.

Mary was talking about the type of family that she wants once she get married and she looked straight at me when she said it. Joyce stated that Jack was to young to get married, and that Mary might find someone better than him when she goes to collage. We all laughed at that statement. After the party, we went to my room to do our homework and Mary asked me if I wanted to make love to her. I told that I did, but I feared that we would get caught so we better not. Just a few minutes later, the birthday boy came running into my room with some paper and crayons to do his ‘homework’ too. I was so glad to see Jack, because that ended any chance of having sex with Mary, not it would be bad to make love to her. I just feel that her offer of sex was a way for her to get back at her parents, but that is a different story. Mary had stated on our first date as boy friend and girl friend that she did not want to have sex until after marriage, but she would take care of my needs by other means. Had she offered to play with my penis today, I think I still would have turned it down today just because.

Today was a very good day

Friday, March 8. Jack came into my room this morning to wake me up, so we could go to school together. I had to tell him that he could not come to school with me today and that he would have to wait until September before going to school. Jack seemed to be OK with that, but September in his mind might be Monday we will see. Jack did ask me a question, as he saw me get out of bed with my diaper showing, would he have to wear a diaper to bed when he went to school. I told him, I do not know.

“Well if I go to school with you, then I need to be in diaper!?” Jack asked.

“No, Jack. I have a problem, I do not wake up when I need to go potty so I need to wear a diaper when I go to bed.”

“You like Matt a baby, me a big boy.”

“Yes you are a big boy, and so was I until some thing happened and I got scared and started wetting my bed.”

“Mommy and Daddy did not check for monsters under your bed for you!” Jack said in a shocked tone.

“It was not a monster, Jack. Oh its time for Blues Clues you better get going Jack or you will miss it.”

At school Mary wanted to talk about yesterday, I asked that we talked about it after school in privet. She asked if I was gay because I turned her offer down. I told ‘NO’ and that we would talk about it later. I did not want to talk about why I did not have sex with her at school.

After school, I saw doctor Ti. This was my last appointment with him. I am so happy. He thinks that it is too early for me to stop seeing him, I don’t think so. Joyce thinks that since the drug problem, that doctor Ti is running scared. And that the money is better spent to pay for my collage tuition than on this guy. I did tell the ‘good doctor’ that maybe I did hide some of my feeling and needed some help in work then out. However, the diapers and being babied did more good to build trust than talk about trust.

Andy and Joyce went out to dinner tonight with some clients so Mary and I baby-sat both Jack and Matt. After the kids were in bed, Mary and I talked about yesterday and her offer of sex. It turns out one of her girl friends had feed her a line, that if a guy turn down sex with you then he is gay, and the first time you have sex with a guy you don’t get pregnant. Mary knows that the last part was wrong and so did I. I told her the first part was wrong too. We ended by kiss and feeling each other body. Mary stopped and asked if I still was wearing diapers. I asked why.

“Do you have any diapers?” Mary asked.

“Yea, there in the closet, why?”

“You will see why!” Said Mary as she went to my closet to find my diapers. The bag of diapers was in the same spot as when she found them the last time. She took one the diapers from the bag and turned around.

“I think I had better put this on you before you have another accident like you did in the Movie Theater.” Mary said with a smile. I blushed when she it. She had my pants and underwear off me in one move. My penis was erect just as fast as she had taken my pants off.

“Oh, look like somebody might like what coming next.” Mary stated to my blushing face. She unfolded the diaper and slid it under my bottom. She put some lotion on her hand, started to rub it in on my stomach, and worked her way down to my balls and then back up my penis. She worked her finger around my penis feeling every inch of it. She spent time with her one finger going around the ridge feeling both the head and the shaft of my penis. Her eyes watched each move her finger made on my penis. The silence was broken when she asked if it felt good what she was doing. Before I could answer, her hand was massaging my erect penis and the pressure was just right that I had no self-control over what would happen next. I did try to stop or slow down what came next, so I could enjoy some more of what Mary was doing to me. I could not slow down this climax, and my semen shot out of me and landed on my chest at shoulder height.

Mary then pulled the front of the diaper up between my legs and over my spent penis and then taped the sides shut. She then took a baby wipe and cleaned me up. Then it was my turn to undress Mary and bring her to a slow, long, deliberate orgasm by mapping her body with my hands and fingers. After a short rest Mary did me again but this time, she did it from the outside of my diaper.

Just thinking about tonight and writing it down has me excited, but I don know when we will be able to do it again. I hope very soon.

Sunday, March 17. St. Patrick’s Day. Drank green beer today! Was over at Scott’s house for a party today and they had green beer. Scott got plastered; I had never seen someone so sick as him, or so dumb. Everyone at the party knows that Scot is in deep trouble with his parents over the drinking. So are most of us too. Scott’s mom called all our parents and had them come and pick us up. Andy picked me up, and took my drivers’ license away, right on the spot for the next three weeks. Some of the other parents followed Andy’s lead in take away drivers’ licenses. I know I will pay big time for that at school tomorrow. On the way home, Andy asked me to come with my punishment besides the loss of my license. I know if it’s to light Andy will not expect it, but I do not want to over do it either. I tried to explain to Andy that I only had a few sips of beer. He said that it did not matter if it was a sip, a few sips, a glass, a pitcher, or a keg I was under age and did it behind their backs and I broke their trust in me. By this time we were home, Andy parked the car. He turned to me and asked what my punishment would be.

“I screwed up OK, it was only a few sips of the beer and I promises not to do it again.” I said.

“And” Andy said.

“Look you got my license, that bigger than grounding me OK.”

“Ken, you know right from wrong, your parents did teach you that right?”

“Yes, sir they did.”

“Were you wrong in drinking the beer?”

“But it was only a few sips, that is the gods honest truth.”

“Were you wrong in drinking? Yes or No, Ken.”

“But”

“Yes, or No”

“No.”

“Wrong answer Ken. Like I said you are under age for drinking even beer. How are we suppose to trust you if you can’t answer a question like ‘were you wrong in drinking beer’? Ken you know that trust is a two way street right?”

“Yes” with caution in my voice, I answered.

“So would you trust me if I put a sign in the front yard saying ‘Sixteen year old boy lives here and he like to wear DIAPERS.’”

“You wouldn’t do that!” I said with some fear that he might.

“You see you are trusting me to be a good parent, and in your case a good guardian, not to do something that would hurt you or belittle you. However we, Joyce and I, expect that you Ken to use good judgment and we would like to trust you. You did not use good judgment and you broke the trust we had in you. Do you understand that.”

“Yes sir.”

“I want you to know this, if you want to try a drink just ask us and be open about it. Say can I try a sip of that beer or that drink, just don’t do it behind our backs OK.” Andy stated.

“Yes sir.”

“Do you have our punishment picked out?” Andy asked in a very serious tone.

“No, sir.”

“OK first you apologize to Joyce then go to your room and wait. No music, no games, no TV you will sit on you bed with your back to the door and wait.” Andy said.

“Yes, sir.”

“Let’s go then.” Andy stated.

I apologize to Joyce for not acting responsible and breaking their trust. Joyce had a few things to say to me on the drinking part. After she dismissed me I went to my room and sat on my bed with my back to the door just like Andy stated, and I waited and waited. My room was growing dark, as the sun was setting and I had a growing need for the bathroom. Andy came in to my bedroom to tell me it was time for dinner and to wash my hands. I got up, went to the bathroom, and did what was needed.

Dinner was corn beef and cabbage, potatoes, and fresh, warm Irish soda bread with home made butter. Dessert was cream puffs with the cream part colored green. After dinner, I did the dishes and Joyce got Matt ready for bed. I was after Matt and Jack where in bed that Andy and Joyce wanted to talk to me about day. I found out that they had talked to some of the other parents including Scott’s about today’s party. It came down to this no driver license for three weeks, no going over to Scott’s home for the next two months because he is grounded for that long, that it.

Monday, Mach 18. Saw Scott in school today with his parents, but did not see him in class. None of the other kids gave me a problem today.

Friday, March 22. Scott has not been in school all week. I found out why, he is in a treatment center for his drinking problem. I have talked to Mary at school. I wish she could come over but she too is grounded because of Scott’s party. So all we can do is write notes to each other and pass them to each other at the end of class as we walk to the school bus together. I am down to my last diaper and I am wearing it now. We are to go shopping tomorrow, I hope I can get some diapers.

Saturday, March 23. Embarrassing, embarrassing what happened today. We stop to get my supply of diapers. Joyce asks the stock-boy if they any diapers in the back that are my size. The problem is the stock-boy is a kid in my gym class named Douglas. Douglas is a jock and likes to make life very uncomfortable. He is always looking for your weak spot and when he find it the whole school know. He now knows my weak spot. I just wanted to die and drop through the floor when Joyce said the diapers were for me. Douglas flashed me a shit eating grin when he said see you Monday in gym class. And under his breath so only I would hear he said ‘you little diaper boy’.

Monday, March 25. Douglas came up to me in the looker room before gym class. He sniffed the air then whacked me on my bottom “What no diaper for you today.” He said in whisper. That was his mark of death, he had your weak spot, and the whole school would know it ever soon. I had seen him mark others in the class and I knew what would come next. After attendance was taken, two tem captains were selected Douglas being one of them. I hoped that Douglas would not pick me, but so much for hope, he did pick me. The game was kick ball inside the gym. Our team was first up to kick. The first person to kick was the first string football kicker, his kick sent the ball to the ceiling and right into the hands of the second base man. Douglas picked me to kick next, the other team moved in because I am so bad at this. The ball was rolled; I took a step and kicked the ball. The ball left my foot and lifted to about eight to nine feet high and sailed across the gym hitting the far coroner wall, the coach whistled it a home run. Douglas lost his shot at embarrassing me about my diapers at lease today.

Jack was playing in my room as I was doing my homework; he sent his car into my closet and went to get it. Jack asked me why I had one of Matt’s baby bottles in my closet. I tried to change the subject but Jack would not let it go of it. Jack was pulling on the front of his pants as if he had to go potty. I asked him if he needed to go potty. He answered no, but keep pulling at his pants. I got up, then pick up Jack, and carried him to the bathroom. Jack has been having some accidents lately. There I slid down his pants and underwear and sat him on the toilet. His underwear was damp, from some of his pee that had leaked out. Joyce came into the bathroom to see what was going on and took over since I had homework to do. I could hear Joyce tell Jack that big boys don’t wet their underwear, and he did want to be a big boy. I did not catch what Jack said because I was back in my room.

Jack came back into my room with just a fresh pair of underwear on and started playing with his car. Joyce called him to come with her; at last, I had quiet for studying. I had finished my homework and headed to the kitchen to get a glass of milk. I was pass through the family room where Jack and Matt were and there was that odor of fresh poop. So I picked up Matt, and took him back to his room to change his diaper. The diaper that Matt was wearing was dry and not soiled. So back, we went to the family room. I set Matt back down, but the smell was still there and I went to the kitchen. Joyce was fixing dinner and I commented about the smell in the family room.

“You know you could change Matt’s diaper, it would not kill you, you know. Besides I am trying to fix dinner here.” Joyce said.

“I just checked Matt’s diaper, and he was clean and dry.” I said defending myself.

“JACK! Please come here now!” Joyce said in a tone of voice that indicated that he might be in some form of trouble, but no full name type trouble.

Jack came into the kitchen. “Did you poop in your pants, young man?” Joyce asked.

“No.” Jack said.

Being behind Jack, I could see the brown mess and stain on his underwear. “He did, and it soak through too.”

“Ken, take him and him cleaned up. I have to get it out of what ever he was sitting on.” Joyce said.

I picked up Jack and carried him back to Matt’s room. I placed Jack on the changing table and removed his soiled underwear. I grasped his ankles and lifted, just as if I was changing his diaper, and then started to clean him up. Jack was squirming around while I was doing this. I decided giving him a bath would be quicker, so I finished undress him. I carried him to the bathroom and placed him in the bathtub and then started to full the bathtub with warm water.

By the time I was done giving Jack a bath Joyce had arrived at the bathroom door and not in a good mood. I took Jack out of the tub and wrapped a towel around him. Joyce took Jack by the arm, and administered one good swat to his, towel covered bottom, he started to cry. Joyce then took Jack in tow and headed back to Matt’s room. Joyce had Jack place the soiled underpants, one of his favorite pairs, in the wastebasket. After that, Joyce then got the last diaper that would fit Jack and put it on him. Joyce through all of this was telling Jack how disappointed she was with him, and since he was acting like a baby, she would treat him like one. I may have thought that when Joyce treating me like a baby it was not as kind as she treats Matt, Jack was really in for a surprise.

After dinner Joyce went to the store and bought the jumbo size package of diapers for Jack. After that, she asked me to help her turn Jack’s bed back in to a crib. With in less than an hour we had changed his room back into a room for a baby. By now it was time for Jack to go to bed, he wanted to go potty. Joyce told him that he was back in diapers, he was a baby, and babies use their diapers.

“I am a big boy.” Jack stated.

“No you are a baby Jack. Big boys don’t wet or mess in their underpants, but babies do wet and mess in their diapers.” Joyce said.

“Am not a baby!” Jack stated.

“Yes you are.” Joyce said, and she finished removing the last of Jack’s clothes and started to put his PJs on. “See you are wearing a diaper and not big boy underwear.”

“Am not a baby, I AM A BIG BOY just like Ken.”

“Ken would you please get me Jack’s bottle.” Joyce asked me I started for the kitchen.

“Now Jack, you are going to be a good baby for mommy right or is mommy going to …” I head as I walked to the kitchen to get Jack a bottle.

Later that night I commented to Joyce that she seem so kind and understand to my bedwetting and later my wishes to be diapered and babied. However, with Jack at was not so kind, it was as if she tried to embarrass him. She said that there is a difference between Jack and me. First, all of Jack’s accidents occur only during the day when Jack was a wake. Jack knew that he needs to go to the bathroom but did not. All of my accidents were at night and I embarrassed by them. Jack pushed the limit with the number of ‘accidents’ today, and that told Joyce that actions and not words were needed. I to pushed the limits but in very different ways. For Jack being put back into diapers is not a big deal, but changing his room is. He worked hard to get a big boy bed and the privileges that go with it, now that’s all changed. Me on the other hand, at first I saw diapers as being an item for babies and did not want any thing to with them. I blushed when Joyce said that. I asked how long she was going to treat Jack this way. Her answer was until the diapers run out or Matt is ready to potty train. Then she would potty train and/or re-potty train all of us boys. She asked me if I wanted her to start diapering me. I answered no, I may like my diapers, but I know I don’t want to live in them twenty-four hours a day seven-day a week, at least not yet.

Sunday, April 7. I got my drivers license back to today. I had to baby sit Matt and Jack today as Andy and Joyce took the day for them self’s, something with the church. Jack is still in diapers day and night and still sleeping in a crib. At first, he was not too happy about being back in diapers and a crib, but he is adjusting to them. He still says that he is a big boy and Joyce corrects him saying he is a baby. If Jack does turnout to be a bed-wetter, I hope this punishment does not turn him off diapers, and that he can have the fun with his diapers, that I have with my diapers. The other parents question Joyce about what happed with Jack and his potty training. She tells them that Jack started having many accidents and he went back to being diapered.

Since Andy and Joyce are out and I am not allowed to have any one over not even Mary. Because of that, I too am enjoying a day in diapers with Matt and Jack, the only problem is I don’t have a big brother to change my diaper. Oh well. I do wonder at times like this why I like my diapers so much.

I have started look for a part time job today. I am finding out that cars are an expense even when they sit. The insurance bill is in of the next six months of coverage it is more than some of the jobs will pay for the same period. That sucks!

Joyce told me something tonight; Douglas is a nursery helper at their church. Joyce told me that Douglas told his mom that a girl he likes is a nursery helper too; the only thing is all of the other nursery helpers are parents. Now, I have some dirt on Douglas, or should I just call him Doug, that I can put to good use. One other item she dropped on me was starting next Sunday; we were going to church. I will go just to let Doug know that I now know his little secret.

Sunday, April 14. Oh the joy! The church only has about sixty member families unlike the church that my parents attended that had three full services on Sundays. I asked to take Matt to the nursery knowing that Doug would be there. The look on Doug’s face when he saw me was shock and fear I think.

“What are you doing here?” Doug asked.

“Dropping off Matt, here. I understand you are a nursery helper.” I said.

“Ahh. No I was just …” He was cut off.

“Doug, Amanda needs her bottle and maybe a diaper change, Please do it.”

“Yes, Mrs. Ball.” Doug said.

“Can I help you young man?” Mrs. Ball asked me.

“Yes, I here to drop off Matt Rice.” I said.

“And you are?” Mrs. Ball asked.

“Ken Kelly, I am living with the Rice’s.” I said.

“Hello Betty.” Joyce said.

“Hello Joyce, how are you?” Mrs. Ball stated.

“Fine thank you. Betty, this is Ken he has been living with us since September 11 when his parents were killed in New York.” Joyce said.

“Nice to meet you Ken.” Mrs. Ball said as she put her hand out to shake mine.

“Nice to meet you Mrs. Ball.” I said as we shook hands.

“Well it look like you know Doug.” Mrs. Ball stated.

“Yes, we go to the school and have a class in common.” I stated.

We said our hellos, and then left Matt and his diaper bag in the nursery. Then Joyce and I went in to sanctuary for the church service. We sat in a pew with Mr. and Mrs. McShort and some other families.

After the service at the coffee hour, I meet some more people and they welcomed me to their church. Joyce was talking to Mrs. McShort and I said that would get Jack and Matt. Mrs. McShort stated that I should get to know Doug because he did not have many friends. I questioned that statement with him being a jock and all that. It turns out that with school, sports, and working at the family story. Doug had no real friends. I almost told her why he did not have any friends because of his making fun of the other students including me.

When I got Matt, Doug said if I told any one about him being a helper that my secret would be all over the school. I said fine but the same goes for you too Doug. For now, Doug is not a problem and I might get through school without any one finding out about my diapers, other than Mary.

As I write this I wonder … what Doug might wish for … could he want to be … Hmmm.

Monday, April 15. Tax day! Did you know that dead people pay taxes, I had to file a tax return for my parents today with a check for the tax due. The tax person added a note to the tax form stating that my parents were among the ones killed on September 11, we will see if it does any good or not.

PE class was fun today, Doug got a good taste of what it’s like to be picked on and I did not start it or have anything to do with it, OK I did laugh. Because it was such a nice day today, (temperature was in the mid 70’s) we had PE class outside. Doug ended up falling, the front of his gym shorts’ were soaking wet, and the teacher did not see it happen. One of the kids teased Doug about wetting his shorts just as the coach for the baseball team could see and hear what was being said. The coach told Doug that he did not want any pants wetting from his players. Well the other kids picked that up to mean that Doug had wet his pants before; well it is now around school that Doug wets his pants. The next time I saw Doug a girl said was telling him that her baby brother wears a diaper so not to wet his pants maybe he should too. Doug is very upset by it all, but maybe he will stop teasing every one now.

Church Dinner April 21, Sunday

The church had its monthly pot luck dinner tonight and we being Joyce, Jack, Matt and myself went as Andy is on the road this weekend. The fours of us where sitting across from Mr. and Mrs. McShort and Doug, and Mr. and Mrs. Kalis were next to us. Thing were going well, the meal was very good and the selection of cakes and pies. I can eat, and I did try a sample of all the food, but the double rich dark chocolate cake was the best.

Matt needed his diaper changed and I knew it so did Mrs. Kalis, but the smell had not made it to Joyce yet, and she was talking so I took charge of getting a fresh diaper on Matt. Doug walked with to the nursery with us I said that I would be just a few minutes, but Doug came on in any way.

“Can I ask you a question.” Doug stated.

“You just did.” I said.

“Very funny.” Doug said, with a hint of being pissed off in his voice. “I am not joking around.”

“OK ask.” I said, trying to sound as if I was mad that he would ask.

“Look this is hard for me. OK” Doug said.

Oh boy, he looking for more dirt on me, I thought to myself.

“What is it like to ‘you know’.” Doug asked, as he now holding Matt’s used diaper.

“I do not know what you are talking about, and besides that I am done changing Matt’s diaper so I am out of here.” I said.

“You’re the only one I know that I can ask the question too.” Doug stated with a hint of embarrassment.

“Fine, ask your question straight out.” I said.

“BOY’S, WHAT are you doing in here.” A voice said from the doorway.

We turned around and saw Mrs. Walczak standing in the doorway.

“Hello Mrs. Walczak.” Doug said.

“Hello, Doug. Your friends are who and why are you in here?” Mrs. Walczak asked.

“I am Ken, and this is Matt my … Ahhh … my sort-of brother.” I said.

“Is something wrong with Matt?” She asked. The tone was far from caring.

“No, I was just changing his diaper and I done.” I said.

“OK then, you two can leave. Doug I want a word with you.” She ordered.

Matt and I left the nursery, and the nursery door shut with a loud bang behind us. The question is what question did Doug want to ask me, and better still what trouble is he in now. We walked back to the table and sat down. A few minutes later Doug came and sat down, I could see tears still on his face from where he had been crying.

“What wrong honey?” Mrs. McShort asked Doug.

“Mrs. Walczak said I was fired as a nursery aid.” Doug stated.

“Oh Doug, am so sorry.” Joyce said.

Mrs. McShort just hugged him and said it would be OK. It turns out that Mrs. Walczak reason for firing Doug was that she felt that the nursery aid should be a girl and not a boy, he had done nothing wrong. Other than not be the right sex for the job.

Before the church pot luck dinner ended Mrs. Walczak made the announcement that she was looking for a new nursery aid and any girl(s) interested should see her because Doug had been let go. That brought a firestorm of questions and raised the fear that Doug had done something to one or more of the children. Mrs. Walczak stated her reason for firing Doug, and in this day and age, it did not go over well she also stated that Doug had done on wrong that she knew of. Doug did his job back as nursery aid via a quick vote by the parents that used the nursery, Mrs. Walczak was not so lucky about her job in the nursery.

After the kids were in bed I told Joyce about Doug and what the coach had said about his wet gym short’s and what happened in the nursery tonight. She asked me, would I be a friend to Doug if he asked. I told her that I thought he was trying to find more dirt on me that he could use later. She stated that maybe, he too has a problem and is looking at different solution before going to his parents with it. That might be but I still think he is look for dirt on me.

April 21 - 22 in the wee hours. I am sick! I am throw up every fifteen minutes. Every thing I eat today is coming out. I am throwing up so hard that I am peeing in to my diaper at the same time, and what I did not throw up is coming out my butt as liquid and little bits. The acid is burning the skin on my bottom as my diaper holds its load of poop and the smell, will make you sick. Oh God please make it end. Joyce heard me and came to see if I needed anything. She got my diapers, and some supplies from Matt’s room, and then she changed my wet and soiled and very smelly diaper. She cleaned up my bottom and put something on it to stop the burning and then cleaned up the rest of me and put a fresh diaper on me. Joyce changing my soiled diapers eight more times tonight she didn’t have to change me or care for me but she did. I can only say thank you to her for her caring and changing my diapers, it’s so little for all the work and smell that she put with tonight. Tonight put a big dent in my limited diaper supply.

No, school for me today, still not feeling well. Joyce kept me diapered today so that I could get some sleep and feel better. Joyce has been a real mom to me, not just the diapers and changing them but caring for me as if I was one of her kids.

April 23. Feeling much better today, went to school. After school, we went to get me some more diapers. We went to the medical supply store that the McShort’s own. The McShorts are looking for some one to work part time at the store, the hours would be after school to five thirty and from nine to noon on Saturday. I did fill out a job application. Joyce had called my order in this time is was two bag of diapers. I said I just needed the one Joyce wanted a spare bag just in case I was sick again, not a bad idea.

April 30. Tuesday. I got a job. I will be working for the McShorts. I start on Monday, but they asked that I come in on Saturday to fill out the paper work. The one benefit will be I can my diapers at cost.

Joyce started to re-potty train Jack today, its odd to see Jack with just a shirt and socks on and no diaper or pull-up. Jack remembered how to use the potty so this might go well this time. He still is diapered at night and is sleeping in his crib, he has not earned back his big boy bed yet.

May 4, Saturday. Mary and I went out on a date had a good time. We went to a new place called the Up Town Café. It is a place for teens to hang out and the local churches run it. It has a few rules, no drugs, no alcohol, no smoking, and no pushing of religion. That is not a problem for us. They have a live band that is good and it is turning out to be the in place. Tonight after dancing at the Café, I drove her home, as we did not have time to pleasure each other tonight because Mary had to be home by ten.

May 6, Monday. My first day on the job, and there is so much to learn. Ed, Mr. McShort showed me around the back room of the shop. He also showed me how to punch in and out on the time clock. My job to unpack the pallet(s) with store supplies on it and place each item on the correct shelves in the back and count them to make sure they match the shipping invoice. Sounds easy, until you have to hunt each shelf to fine where it goes. Doug came in at five and helped me finish my first pallet, I don’t know where any thing goes or how to tell if it is 13mm widget or 14mm widget by looking at it, but Doug can. When Doug is sorting the items’ he looks like the guys in the old movies sorting mail by hand. The thing is, we did not talk it was just him and I in the stock area working alone a perfect time to talk.

May 17, Friday. My first paycheck, my gross pay is one hundred three dollars and fifty cents, what I got was sixty-five dollars and some change. Jack is no longer running around naked from the waist down. He is potty trained again during the day, but is still in diapers at night and has taken to having a bottle in bed with him I think he likes being a baby.

More to come…